I don't think that it's a done deal that society accepts Billy has two Daddies, one of whom comes to PTA meetings and the other one who makes cookies for the bake sale. And when they both chaperone the prom, they steal some time for a slow dance.
Oh, I totally agree with that. But I think that PTA-meeting Daddies will get acceptance more quickly than bump-and-grind Daddies. I guess.
Most of those homophobes probably don't accept that in straight people either.
Exactly.
Although Matt has an excellent point, that the very non-threatening image conveyed by PTA-Daddies has thrown the hard-core homophobes into a tizzy, because they know as well as we do that being unthreatening is a first step to acceptance (for some folks).
Adventures from working at home: A commercial on Animal Planet for "Colon Flow". For humans, not animals.
Sorta like Colon Blow on SNL?
Yeah, I think definitely more people are OK with Bob and Tom down the street who wear sweater vests and seem very nice and keep their lawn mowed, and way fewer people are comfortable with that middle-aged guy in the apartment down the hall who walks outside in chaps and a vest to go to the bar at night. But there are definitely people who don't like Bob and Tom, either.
That said, I definitely think there's opposing forces within the gay community--some want Bob and Tom and that nice Lisa and Jan who have the cute baby to be the face of the gay community, even during Pride, because it's easier for America to empathize with. And others who are like "No, fuck the homophobes, the drag queens and dykes on bikes are not only part of our community, they're the part that STARTED this whole fucking Pride thing, and if you disavow them, you're just as bad as the homophobes". Which I have to sympathize with.
Sorta like Colon Blow on SNL?
That's exactly what I thought of.
I don't think homophobes find it easy to accept gay people of any sort
Well, yes, there is that. I totally didn't mean to imply there were "allowed gayness" criteria, or anything. Just that there's a level of comfort when the icky people are easily spotted and treated badly.
Suppose you let one sit next to you on the bus???? No, if they're wearing chaps, you can pearl clutch and stalk off to the other side of the vehicle.
If in the end, what you want is for more people to be more tolerant and accepting, then the Ellen approach is the one that has the best chance. I just spent a week in rural Texas with extended (conservative) family. They *love* Ellen because she's funny and kind and makes fun of herself.
Seriously, Ellen has done so much (just by being herself) to further gay rights in places like Kerrville, Texas. My cousin even said, "I was against gay marriage until I thought about Ellen and Portia not being able to see each other in the hospital." It's just like when you think you hate [fill in the blank] until your daughter marries one and then suddenly it's "oh, he's treating her very well, and is good to his children, and he's great fun bowling!"
I think nothing changes people like relationships do. And Ellen (and NPH on Twitter, etc) makes people feel they know her, and she knows them. It breaks down perceptions and biases.
ETA prude alert: I HATE chaps when people are fucking naked under them. I don't care if you're gay, straight, bi, whatever, I DO NOT WANT TO SEE YOUR ASS CHEEKS. And I don't want naked body parts on public transportation.
Oh, I totally agree, javachik (and I love Ellen!!). But at the same time, having people in the community say "NO, you shouldn't have men in Speedos dancing on floats at Pride, we can't give the wrong impression to the media and straight people! It should be all about couples and their children and how we're JUST LIKE YOU!" pisses me off.
Just a quick aside: javachik, my brother lives in (or at least near) Kerrville! Small world.
Eta: meara, that's something I have been thinking about lately, how having a little bit of grudging acceptance can make for more pressure to conform to broad societal norms than being very marginalized. Not that I am for marginalization, but it's a weird side effect of progress.
