Owen had an awesome birthday. Dinner at his favorite Mexican restaurant, cupcakes at school and we went swimming at the Y this evening. This weekend: Lego store in the Mall of America.

I am very, very happy with the way I've turned out at 41. Not what I planned when I was in my 20s but still not bad. I'm glad I found derby and in spite of being overweight and probably pre-diabetic, I feel AWESOME and more in shape than I've ever been.

Who needs some cuteness? Here! [link] (dog helps nurse injured piglet back to health)

For full disclosure, I have 30-40 links saved open in Chrome, but that thing is a *dog*. I cannot keep it open in the background without everything else grinding to a halt. So I only open it when I need to follow those threads. Firefox and Safari are not reliable for saving open tabs. This is the *first* time Opera has ever lost mah shit, and I've been doing this overloading for years. I'm startled.

I had a separate 40 or so open on my PC too, but that was seriously just a symptom of a chaotic mind, so I bookmarked or read all of those. Still have a chaotic mind, though.

I feel pretty strongly about wills, too.

I’ve had a will since I got married the first time when I was 25; my ex-husband had lost his father to ALS when he was still in high school, so he’d been through it firsthand. I updated to a trust (despite my total lack of assets) after the divorce. ND had never done a will, but after his dad passed a few years ago, he realized how important it was. It was such a painful and difficult legal process even WITH a will. We created a trust together (with living wills and power of attorney) this past year.

I actually had to have a fight with my parents (both, individually) about getting a will done. My dad had the “You’re my only daughter and I’m divorced so you’ll get everything anyway” attitude, and it took me really putting my foot down and giving him a loving “no really Dad, you don’t understand how much harder my life will be” smack down before he finally got it done. My mom wasn’t opposed to getting one done but in typical Pix’s Mom-ADD fashion, kept putting it off. She, too, finally got it done after we Had a Talk. Getting a will done is truly one of the kindest, most loving things a person can do for his or her family.

I’m so sorry that you’re having to deal with a lack of will in addition to the grief and trauma, Maria.

What does a trust involve?

Legal Zoom has a good overview: [link]

Much more expensive up front, but a good investment if you have assets or think you may eventually have them.

Quoting LegalZoom, because I still have that tab open: "A Living Trust is used to transfer property to beneficiaries. But unlike a last will, a living trust is not usually subject to probate court, which can take years and cost thousands in attorneys' and court fees."

My sister has one. As I understand it, the trust is legally a separate entity, to which you transfer your assets, but which you retain control of, and you name your heirs as the beneficiaries of the trust, so that when you die, ownership of the trust (and the assets it contains) simply transfers to them without going through probate.

Better info will surely come from actual lawyers on the board.

My mom and dad have theirs done, and their funeral plans paid for and it's a huge relief. There would be no drama between my sister and I, but they wanted everything nice and tied up.

D and I need to do that, esp. with M and the house and everything. If, heavens forfend, something happened to D, I'd be fucked. And my living will and DNR orders are from 1998,and give full power to my folks, which would be fine, I think, but it still needs to be updated.

My living will is basically "Kill me if I will have brain damage that leaves me vegetative or if I'm in a coma for longer than 6 months, then farm my bod out for parts and burn the rest. Then throw a party. Lots of booze. If you don't laugh more than you cry, I will haunt your ass. SERIOUSLY. Did I mention LOTS OF BOOZE? Love, Me"

But before the will, we must Do The Taxes this weekend. Please god, let us get money. Please, please, please.

My parents' wills are all up to date since October, because, yeah. My sister and I are still ignoring our own shit, though.

My father is also trying to put my name on all his accounts, but I have no real idea what's going on. I just keep signing paper and sending him ID. All he has to do is never die, and I'll never find out what he's doing.

We need to update our wills. At least my attorney sister helps us out.