Stay safe, Stephanie.
I hope it does--the past six months got me much closer to my mother, and changed my life in a number of positive ways, even though I'd give it all back for her never to have been sick. The "face" I put on to cheer her up is really me, and it's one of the best sides of me, and this whole deal made me pull *that* ita ! out of my back pocket more, and for other people too. I'm still sick and whiny and in pain, but I know I can kick it up to eleven and exceed people's expectations in ways I honestly had no idea about before.
I've found places where I can cope with a lot more than I'd have thought possible. I've also found some limits. It's all really valuable knowledge that I wish I hadn't had to know so concretely but now I do know it, so I use it.
The phone thing is just that my dad haven't even talked a lot on the phone and even when we did, it was when we were both along on our respective sides of the phone. And mom hovers over him now. Especially on the phone. She wants to listen and, I guess judge how well he's doing and everything. But it stifles our conversations so badly. So calls are, by necessity short. I'm trying to make it so I visit about once a month. That helps. Because if she's far enough away not to overhear, or out of the house, we can talk. It's just stressful.