Dana, I am so sorry.

OMG, my Batman leather jacket arrived.

I cannot WAIT to see pictures of you in it. Eeee!

Goals? I actually do have them, am working toward them, and simultaneously feel like OMG THIS IS HAAAARD and OMG I AM A SLACKER AND NOT PUTTING ENOUGH EFFORT INTO THIS, TRY HARDER.

Have you defeated Laurence Fishburne yet?

I know kung fu?

but it's his family, so

Yeah, exactly. This is so totally up to him and them.

Dana, what a sad clusterfuck. I'm so sorry.

Hey, did you hear about this copy editor who died a millionaire? [link]

My hero!

My sister went to Cambridge. Twice. I feel this is a problem in our relationship. I never visited her there. I've never been to Cambridge, period. I have no independent idea what that part of her life was like. I mean, she knows a lot of things I don't know. Like the stuff she was studying when she was there. But I feel jealous that I don't know the life parts.

Part of me thinks that if I'd chosen Oxford over McGill, then I'd totally get it. But then...I wouldn't understand her McGill life. Like, I got to live that part and purloin her friends.

So there's no fixing that.

I HADN'T REALISED I WAS JEALOUS SHE WENT OFF TO SCHOOL WITHOUT ME.

This a radically emotionally stunted reaction to be actually having. And, honestly, if you watch Supernatural, don't say it. I get it. But she just sent me an email about an Oxbridge-generated response she's having to something and I have no fucking clue what she's talking about. This is not par for our course.

Oh Dana. I'm sorry.

Dana, I'm so sorry. That's just adding injury to insult.

That makes three developers in the past couple years that would rather say "yes" than work out if "yes" means they're agreeing with me. It's really kind of creepy, but I wonder if it's an ESL defense mechanism where they're behind in the translation and are trying to buy time or something.

I've worked with a couple ESL people who would always say "yes" no matter what. Apparently it would be impolite to say "no"? I'm working with a conference-issue editor right now who's been politely not saying no for four weeks, and finally I've realize that he simply has no intention of providing the thing I've been asking him for. In retrospect, it's kind of impressive how he's managed to never just tell me he's not going to do it.

I can't decide which drives me more batshit--the constant yes, or the yawning silence.

But, man, I really miss the developer who just told me no on everything and that he didn't like me and that I ruined his work day. We got along fabulously. But...he's already in India, and he's leaving the company proper at the end of the month.

I really depend on chemistry. More than I should, maybe, but when I can pull it off, I really pull it off. We got some shit accomplished.

Current developers? I don't think they care about me enough to go the extra mile at my behest.

All of this angsting about accomplishments reminds me... did anyone hear Fresh Air today? Ann Marie Slaughter discussed her article about how women can't have it all that's coming in next months Atlantic. [link]

So, the thing is, the woman just comes across as incredibly privileged and entitled. YES, living away from home 5 days a week is much harder than living at home and working and missing your kids. But the fact that you could leave your high stress, high hour State job to go back to be a tenured professor at Princeton, where it is easier to balance your life with your family... sigh. Cry me a fucking river.

I can't even finish packing my fucking house or getting the internet to work at the new one.

The only Oxbridge nonsense I know I learned from Stephen Fry and watching Lewis.