I used to tell a guy I worked with "no" all the time. The I'd ask him what end result he wanted and would give him that. He finally learned to trust that I'd ask the right questions and do the right things to get him what he wanted. I met his wife once and she LOVED that I would let him tell me what to do.

Dammit, one of the guys I work well with (manages the team that's my primary business user) was explaining some management tactic to me--it involved quadrants of motivation and ability, and indicated what techniques you use when you're dealing with someone that was, say, highly motivated but low on capability, or both highly capable and highly motivated, etc. And it made me wonder--is that why we work so well together? Are you playing me, motherfucker?

But, hey, results! So he can keep doing it. I wish more people would, all told.

Can one use those techniques on one's self? Because I *live* in the high capability, low motivation quadrant.

Because I know you were on tenterhooks - I have not heard back from Mr. Ar-TEEST "pop culture is commercial and superficial" Dude.

Oh Dana, I'm so sorry.

That's just adding injury to insult.

Not to mention the further insult of having to choose between work and family. Gah!

article about how women can't have it all

I want to read that but I am worried that it will just make me angry. hrm.

And it made me wonder--is that why we work so well together? Are you playing me, motherfucker?

He probably is but you can just think of it as him acting in a situationally appropriate and effective manner.

People. I just spent FOUR HOURS trying to climb out of the rabbit hole that is picking a new duvet cover for the guest room that is 1) affordable, 2) appropriate for the godawful baby-poo tan wall color, and 3) not circa 1984. I also finally bought a pair of full-size sheets to replace the ancient queen sized ones we’ve been using for years (this took an additional hour reading conflicting reviews on overstock.com). That should not have taken that long, seriously.

What prompted this, by the way, is the fact that the current duvet cover -- a fading microsuede beige thingy with a satiny bottom -- has become the kittens’ latest plaything. They run full tilt and jump on, at which point they ride the sucker like a surf board as it slides off the bed. I am tired of having to wash the duvet every week because it has yet again ended up in a pile on the floor.

This is the duvet I finally settled on: [link]

Please don’t’ tell me it’s ugly. I might cry. NO ONE TOLD ME BUYING A DUVET WOULD MAKE ME FRAGILE.

Pix, it's gorgeous, and an incredible deal to boot. Please don't cry!

Lovely, Pix!

It's a great deal too, Pix. I, however, want video of the kittens surfing on the duvet.

Very pretty. Marimekko fabrics are awesome.