"assigned" is not the word I'd use, as it makes gender for me something put on me by other people (with the subtext that I've passively accepted it), which seems antithetical to the whole point of the thing.

But isn't that basically what happens at birth? The kid can't decide. In most cases, physical anatomy is clear, and so the gender that corresponds to anatomy is assigned. When the doctor says "It's a boy!" that's pretty much gender assignment. It's just that in most cases, internal and external match up, so in those cases, no one chafes at being assigned a gender.

No, the kid can't decide, but isn't the argument that gender is somehow intrinsic to the person? That if, for some reason I'd been "assigned" maleness, I would have recognized this as inaccurate at some point? I think of "assigned" as like classrooms or work groups: something artificial. I also think of the opposite of "assigned" as "chosen" (and choosing to be something other than what you were assigned is often seen as a heroic act: bucking tradition, rising above your station, etc), and that seems like dangerous territory to go into.

I think of "assigned" as like classrooms or work groups: something artificial.

Yeah, but I think that's the intent of the phrasing -- ze was assigned gender X at birth, but hir true identity is gender Y. (Or it may X after all, but the initial assignment isn't what determines actual gender.)

I think of "assigned" as like classrooms or work groups: something artificial.

Yeah, but I think that's the intent of the phrasing -- ze was assigned gender X at birth

This. It's not "male-assigned"; it's "male-assigned-at-birth," which indicates that the person in question had no say in it, and the assignment is therefore artificial. t edit I didn't make up the term; I'm just sharing what I've heard used. I have no beef with it, but I'm also cool with cisgender, because as a word, it's precise and a thing of beauty. Does what it says on the can.

I also think of the opposite of "assigned" as "chosen"

I didn't choose to be a woman. The assignment at birth happened to be correct, but I still never had a defining moment when I chose to be a woman.

the initial assignment isn't what determines actual gender

This is what makes me uncomfortable with it. Because, to me, the use of the word "assigned" implies that it does.

I didn't choose to be a woman.

Right. One doesn't choose to be a gender, and the idea of assignment-to-a-gender-by-doctors-or-anyone-else as meaningful enough to be the term to be used to describe my experience makes me uncomfortable. They correctly identified my gender. They correctly recognized it. They didn't assign it.

Did I choose to be CIS? Is that the idea?

I view "cis" as a descriptor of your experience (was identified as female at birth, continues to self-identify as such) which is to a larger degree imposed by other people. I don't really see it as choose-able, but that's a separate issue from what we're discussing. I like "cis" because it doesn't imply that gender isn't inherent.

Use whatever terminology you like. It's late, and I'm done.

I thought that CIS had to do more with what was culturally considered feminine/masculine.

Like a dude wearing Ed Hardy shirts and a chick with a butterfly tat on her lower back.

Heh. I kid. You know what I mean, though?

Did i tell you guys that i just found out that tranny is an offensive slur? And that I've been using it for years and now feel like a TOTAL ASSHOLE?

Yikes, sorry to start a thing.

Thank you for helping me to properly word my homework. I was writing an online unit about Girl Scouts influencing changes in the US and I had a section specifically about Bobby from Colorado who joined a Girl Scout troop and the subsequent request for the boycotting of the cookies.

I am still very unsure of what terminology to use because I am on the outside looking in and not at all sure from moment to moment what will or could or might piss people off or offend them. It is not a ... gah, how do I word this? World? that I am in on a regular basis and getting the terminology down and the reasons for particular terms can be confusing to me. I still Google half the dang terms and then look itup elsewhere to try to figure out what is considered right and non-offensive or dismissive, etc.

It's hard out there for a straight girl, yo!