But I've always tried to live my life being kind to others. And it hurts to fail. But yeah, it's not all over.

as long as you were truthful, you were not unkind. And even if you were, you were doing what's best for your children.

I don't think I have any tea. Thanks for the suggestions, though.

While I want the kids to see him, I think they are too little for 50/50 given our situation, which is what he says he wants.

Just so you know, I've never heard of a judge ordering a 50/50 physical custody. It's too complicated to do unless both parents are invested in doing it and willing to work with each other. It has to be mutually agreed upon.

Since your ex hasn't worked with you and you've documented the ways he's been unreliable and uncommunicative and he's spent so much time away from the family, the Judge is probably going to give him something like 35% physical custody. Which is like - every other weekend and a weeknight dinner. That's close to the minimum for an interested parent.

He is going to be pretty angry about the journal. I'm just warning you.

Anything that will get your blood sugar and fluids up could help, Hil.

I want to become a finisher. I'm a good starter, but I lose momentum and get bored and distracted. I want to strengthen my finishing muscles. Dammit.

You and me both, baby.

He is going to be pretty angry about the journal. I'm just warning you.

Yup. He is. And that's okay. He has the right to how he feels, and they are his kids, too, so he rightfully feels like he's fighting for something important to him too. That's good. It could be a situation where he was uninvolved or uninterested in the kids' lives.

You, however, also have the right to feel hurt by his actions, and you had the right to keep track of what happened. Divorce is never going to be fun or easy or uncomplicated, and you are doing the best you can, making the best decisions you know how to at the time. Some of them are going to suck, and there's no getting around it. There just isn't.

I'm drinking some water. Also watching the extras on the Mamma Mia DVD. I want to go to Greece.

Maria, that is most excellent news!

Stephanie, you did the best you could and that is all anyone can do. Maybe this will be a wake-up call for him, when it's laid out in black and white. If anything, maybe he will start to think about how his behavior affects the kids.

Thanks, everyone. You are wise.

I'm praying we settle before I have to testify.

Hil could make yourself tea with sugar or honey or other caloric sweetener?

Yay for nothing, Maria!