'Safe'
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
"Uh, I'd like to make a report about a car versus squirrel accident."
"so...you hit a squirrel?"
"No, a squirrel fell out of a tree and dented the bejesus out of my car."
"You don't need to make a police report on that, just contact your insurance company."
"So, a cop won't come make a report?"
"On a squirrel falling on your car? No, a police officer is not going to make a report on that."
Did they pull out the "We pay your salary, you know!" card?
How big was this squirrel?
"Were you drunk or high at the time?" "Did someone maliciously hurl the squirrel at your vehicle with the intention of doing damage?"
I love this job sometimes ;P
"We're you previously acquainted with the aforesaid squirrel?" "What was the nature of your relationship?"
"Were you drunk or high at the time?"
"Was the squirrel drunk or high at the time?"
Was it a rapey squirrel?
t /Raising hope
eta white font, just in case
"We're you previously acquainted with the aforesaid squirrel?" "What was the nature of your relationship?"
Anyone who saw this week's Raising Hope is probably both laughing and shuddering at this.
Raising Hope x-post!
*High-Fives Lee*
t-shirts that say SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT MY REPRODUCTIVE CHOICES. They would be marketed in maternity and not-maternity versions; and in matched sets including M-F and M-M and F-F sizes; and with ads featuring adorable looks-just-like-a-clone kids, and wildly diverse kids, and no kids at all with adults living perfectly fulfilled lives. And the kids versions would say shit like HOW IS IT YOUR BUSINESS WHO MY DONOR IS? and WHAT DO YOU MEAN WHERE AM I REALLY FROM? and HELL NO SHE IS NOT THE NANNY.
OMG, I think the sales might pay for Buffista Island.
sj, I send you lots of ~ma of all kinds to get you through this frustrating time.
"We're you previously acquainted with the aforesaid squirrel?" "What was the nature of your relationship?"
"Did the squirrel squirt mustard on you at any time?"
I made a kind of vodka cream sauce. But I used whole milk and sour cream, because I had no cream, and it's watery. Tastes okay, though. I'll have to try again with the right ingredients.