Ack. Dating advice! I'm responding to someone on Geek2Geek. We've Favorited each other, and I've decided to eschew the usual back-and-forth messages because I'm dreadful at it. So I've said "I see we've Favorited each other. I prefer to get to know someone in person. Shall we arrange to meet in some Neutral Zone for a chat and a beverage, and see how we get along?" Is that okay? I really really don't want to say anything that sounds like code for "sex me up!"
(Oh my god. Meeting a guy could lead to sex. Yikes. I want a companion, but guys only get on dating sites looking for sex. Am I ready to have sex again? nnggngnn)
Zen, I wouldn't explicitly name the Neutral Zone as such. Everyone knows that's what's meant by meeting for coffee, etc, but somehow putting it that way makes it sound cold and uninviting.
guys only get on dating sites looking for sex
Since you know that's not true, do you want to go into it with that attitude?
If he does want to hook up exclusively, you'll know pretty fast.
Since you know that's not true, do you want to go into it with that attitude?
I don't actually know that's not true. I figured my attitude was "realistic".
Since you know that's not true, do you want to go into it with that attitude?
I don't actually know that's not true.
I am a guy. It is not true.
I am a guy. It is not true.
You were just the other day unhappy because you went to a dating thing and met a girl who might like to be friends but didn't seem to want to date you.
And yes, this is a dating site and I'm on it, and I wouldn't mind finding a boyfriend. I'm just freaking out a little at the idea of dealing with something that's emotionally fraught for me, with a person who doesn't know my issues and doesn't really deserve to be burdened with them. And yes, I know I don't have to have sex, but I feel like cutting off the possibility of sex - while making me more comfortable - also cuts off the possibility of a relationship developing with a guy I met on a dating site. I hope I'm being clear; I'm not trying to say "all guys are horndogs who only want one thing from any woman"; I don't believe that. It's the context, the context of a dating site, that makes me feel like sex is *expected*. Which is why I've been generally avoiding dating sites and rarely even check the one I am on.
One important thing about dating is there is a good chance that successful dating leads to sex.
Right. My original response was actually because I thought Zen meant that guys were on dating sites for sex, as in casual hook-up sex upon meeting.
