But if you have to go lock yourself in a closet and have a good cry, or go break some dishes or just scream at the sky, don't begrudge yourself that.
Where is he seeing docs? I don't mean to put her on the spot, but lisah's got resources at JHU, and they helped steer her & Bob with second opinions and all. When you are ready to deal with that.
If you do end up coming to B'more for any of this, please know you both can use me as a place to crash. My parents will be here for a week in late October, but even then, there are enough beds.
And if, for any reason, you find yourself wanting to come for second or third opinions or anything at UNC or Duke, you are more than welcome to stay in my guest room.
I am so sorry, Maria. I wish I could do more than send you my love. If there's anything, let me know.
I don't have a guest room, but I know a lot of people who know a lot about cancer doctors in Boston.
This is the worst possible weekend ever to fall apart. I can't fall apart with him here--no fucking way I'm adding to his stress--and I must go to PA at some point this weekend. Not only do we have a 40-year flood to deal with, we still haven't told my father that DH has cancer. Now my hand is forced, and I can't be a mess when I do that. This is going to destroy him. His brother and his son-in-law both diagnosed with cancer in the span of 9 months.
Perkins, I may need to ask you and Ginger lots of questions about dealing with this. Please tell me when I overstep my bounds.
sara, right now he's going back to see the surgeon. He needs to get set up with an oncologist. Washington Hospital Center has a melanoma center, but JHU is always a possibility. That's actually where his dad's doctor's appointment is on Monday. They saved his life by discovering and treating his bladder cancer.
Ugh, I am not the first spouse on this board to go through this. Why am I taking over the place with my drama?
(I am more fragile than spun glass right now. One more hit and I will shatter. I don't like this.)
Maria, whatever I can do, please let me know.
Make it all go away, please? Make my husband healthy.
edit: That's not fair, Plei. I'm sorry.
Ugh, I am not the first spouse on this board to go through this. Why am I taking over the place with my drama?
Because it is a serious blow after a series of serious blows. Because just because someone else went through it, doesn't mean it's not a major, serious thing. Because that's what we're here for.
Maria, I can give you my mother's email, too. She's an RN and went through her own cancer treatment five years ago. Though she's kind of, umm. Kooky. Not in a woo-woo way, but still: kooky. Yet strangely level-headed.
