For a pacifist, I spend a lot of time figuring out how to dispose of the bodies.

LOVE.

One thing I don't know--if you're a het woman, how much of your profile should you devote to trying to keep away the assholes and idiots?

When I am allergicy to one thing, other things seemed to be primed to also be allergic. Which, since our systems are, in fact, systemic, makes sense. But still surprises me every time.

Oh, yeah. If I get poison ivy, I get a gift-with-purchase rash on my stomach.

My tattoo bumps up when I drink. Haven't noticed if it's a barometer, too.

Zen, I agree with the other comments, and breaking it down into shorter paragraphs rather than one long one. But other than that, looks great!

I have a roommate! She's just out of college and here for an internship at the zoo. Seems cool. She's moving in right now and has already written me a check. Yay!

One thing I don't know--if you're a het woman, how much of your profile should you devote to trying to keep away the assholes and idiots?

Most of it. Unfortunately, many assholes and idiots don't bother to read profiles.

How about this?(Gosh, I'm glad I have you guys.)

I'm a geek. I like science fiction and fantasy and horror and comedy. I'm tired of hanging out with people who don't get my jokes. I like action movies with explosions and/or aliens. No weepy chick flicks! Indiana Jones, Serenity, Firefly, Buffy, Angel, Dresden Files, Sherlock, Highlander, Eureka, Warehouse 13, that's the sort of thing I like. I get irritated with people who talk while the show is on. I like writing stories that will never be published, afternoon naps, and long walks in quiet places (no, really. Also pina coladas). I like odd things, odd bits of trivia, and odd people. I like peaceful beautiful places out in the Nature, and I like cities with character and charm. I like driving to places I've never been just to see what's there. I own many books on a wide array of topics, mostly history and science. I'm curious; I ask a lot of questions. Here's what I don't like: noisy places, heavy traffic, and histrionic personal drama, people who are dogmatic, incurious, or unimaginative, and rude, misogynistic, or bigoted attitudes. I can keep my cool in an emergency, and I know what to do in case of a zombie apocalypse. For a pacifist, I spend a lot of time figuring out how to dispose of the bodies.

I'm looking for someone with open-minded curiosity about people, the world, and the universe(s). I'm looking for someone to share things with, to do all the things that are much more fun with someone than alone. Staying up late watching movies or marathon runs of tv shows. Going out to dinner or a movie or a museum. Road trips and exploring.

I still think that body disposal is a solid closer. It loses something in the middle. But, it's great :)

It's not really the middle - there are separate places to enter your profile and "what you're looking for". So I'm still closing with body disposal.

If many things were different, I'd date you, or at least go to movies and zombie apocalypses with you.

When I read some of the descriptions on OKC, I want to write a profile like this:

I believe in proper capitalization; the agreement of subjects and verbs; and a generous sprinkling of complete sentences. Also, I believe in making the red squiggly line go away.

I prefer long walks in a museum to long walks on the beach.

Try to hold my hand when we first meet and you risk losing yours.

I have already found myself. Now I'd like to lose myself again. I am not interested in spiritual quests of any kind.

Being called a lady makes me break out in hives.

To me, LOL means "please go away."

Zen, I think that works much better. I might cut or rephrase this line:

I get irritated with people who talk while the show is on.

if only because it brings the number of sentences about what you don't like up to three. Here's one suggestion:

Indiana Jones, Serenity, Firefly, Buffy, Angel, Dresden Files, Sherlock, Highlander, Eureka, Warehouse 13, that's the sort of thing I like (and require total silence for; talking while the show is on will get you my most charming glare of death).

I may take that bit out. I meant to signify that the story is important; if you're gonna watch the show, then watch it and shut up. But I can't find a way to say that that isn't cranky. I don't want to give the impression that I'm too cranky. Let them find that out personally. It's part of my mystery.