Saying it's not chocolate is like saying skim milk isn't really milk.

Skim milk is just white water.

x-posted from Natter (I actually meant to post this here, but oh well)

I had the funniest texting conversation in my entire life last night, so much so that I decided I had to immortalize it. I typed up the transcript and am cutting/pasting it over here. It was between my two best friends (C and B) and me. The two of them went to the Hollywood Bowl to see a concert last night and proceeded to get very drunk on red wine, despite the fact they had to catch a flight to Mexico today for C's sister's wedding. Hilarity ensued.

Best Text Conversation EVER

C’s phone: We might be drunk at the bowl. Thank heaven for public transit
Me: Hee hee hee. You’re just practicing for the rest of the week.
C’s phone: OMG. Driunk and llospt.
Me: Oh dear. I hope you get ffoundp!
C’s phone: Oh deargodo
Me: Do I need to rescue you two?
B’s phone: C stole b Phonw. Ausw mined died. Still lost but b confibsrnr.
Me: Wow. That text was worthy of Drew on drugs.
B’s phone: I blame the red sine. Wine
B’s phone: It’s all b’s fault
B’s phone: Oh ignore het. Sesame st!! N
Me: Are you two arguing with each other via text over the same phone? That’s awesome.
B’s phone: Maybe. Bur too drunk to notice says C
B’s phone: Where us subway?
Me: Um. Down the hill? A long way?
B’s phone: Oh jeeZ. Maam? R u kidding mr
Me: Where ARE you two?
Me: Oh right. You don’t know.
B’s phone: We are at mr fuzzy. I love mr fuZzy.
B’s phone: O think b lives near here.
Me: Mr fuzzy?
B’s phone: YES subway time!
B’s phone: I the subway took my cc. Win
Me: Water. Water is your friend.
B’s phone: We like salsa
Me: Also water.
B’s phone: Who ate them people?

[At this point, I had to text our friend Fionn to share this awesome conversation. Apparently he and a couple of our other friends started texting B’s phone commenting on their texts.]

B’s phone: Dis you tell fionn of Joe re wheat bread???
Me: Um. Wheat bread? What?
Me: Fionn and I exchange things that make us laugh. At the moment, you two are making me laugh. Joe and Leia happen to be hanging out with him.
B’s phone: Yeah. We are so not drunk. I swear. )this is c. Phone still dead
Me: Riiiight
B’s phone: No swear. Phone dead.
Me: It’s really a damn shame texting won’t be possible in Mexico. I could start a blog.
B’s phone: Bacon? You had bacon?
B’s phone: B is curious.
B’s phone: Blog!!
Me: Bacon? What? Are you meaning to text me?
B’s phone: U blame Fiobn
Me: Fiobn is to blame for many things.
B’s phone: Thai food = good
B’s phone: Yep.
Me: Yes. And now that I know you two are happily eating and not lost on a subway platform somewhere with Mr Fuzzy, I need to go to sleep. Night, besties!
B’s phone: Night! (I lost b. This is C.. Bur there is food)
Me: Try to lose B. She is cute.

[I never heard back, but hopefully C eventually found B, charged her phone, and made it home.]

I love anise when it's used as a spice, but hate licorice. I have layers.

This is me.

In the chocolate debate, dark, dark, darkity dark, thankyouverramuch.

And if happens to be dusted with sea salt & toffee, you'll hear no objections from me.

Jessica, sunscreen often has cocoa butter in it but it doesn't make it chocolate. *evil grin*

Pix, that is a consonant extravaganza!

Jars, I am so with you on salt licorice. I first tried it when I was in Denmark. I hated the first one. But then I tried it again and fell in love. It's very difficult to find US licorice that's worth a damn. Partly because they seem to rely almost entirely on anise with very little licorice root in evidence. Panda is the best US brand I know of. But real hardcore deep dark licorice is the province of Northern Europe.

I so do not get you mixers of chocolate with sea salt.

Just sayin'.

I so do not get you mixers of chocolate with sea salt.

It's decadent.

Jessica, sunscreen often has cocoa butter in it but it doesn't make it chocolate. *evil grin*

If this is going to turn into an argument about American food labeling laws, then that's a whole nother thing.

Sweet and salt (often) go well together! I like bacon and I like chocolate. I never thought I'd like a Vosges bacon chocolate bar but I was wrong.

Nah. I think it's a difference in the definition of chocolate. For me, it is the cocoa mass, not the cocoa butter that makes something chocolate. That's why cookies made with cocoa but not cocoa butter are chocolate cookies. Cookies made with cocoa butter and not cocoa mass would be just cookies made with another kind of fat than shortening/butter/oil.

I so do not get you mixers of chocolate with sea salt.

I've yet to meet a food that's not made either better or at least interesting by the addition of some salt.