"I do not subscribe to this, but I know that some feel that … if a baby cannot make it through birth, it is not favored evolutionarily."

OK, she did say she didn't subscribe to this.

I mean, if she's lying, sure, go ahead and slug her. But don't just brain the messenger because you don't like the message.

The fact that she brings it up, though, means she thinks there's merit. There is NO other reason for her to even mention it, the sanctimonious wrong-headed, insensitive bitch. (In the context of her conversation with the mother.)

OK, she did say she didn't subscribe to this.

I had this reaction, too. Like, maybe she's horrifically tactless and monumentally stupid.

But obviously not everyone read it the same way.

I'm not defending her; regardless of whether she's being stupid and tactless or being sanctimonious, that's not something you say to an expectant mother who had a traumatic first birth.

I got that Bialik said she didn't subscribe to it -- I was reacting to whoever out there *does*, whom I didn't know existed until I read her quote.

The fact that she brings it up, though, means she thinks there's merit. There is NO other reason for her to even mention it, the sanctimonious wrong-headed, insensitive bitch. (In the context of her conversation with the mother.)

No it doesn't. The fact that she brings it up means that someone called and asked her about home birth stuff for an article. We don't even know who brought it up, really. It could have been the questioner.

Should she have pretended, upon being asked, that she'd simply never heard the question addressed?

I was reacting to that and to her snide remark about, "I felt like a failure ... But it's not like I had a C-section."

I'm not defending her; regardless of whether she's being stupid and tactless or being sanctimonious, that's not something you say to an expectant mother who had a traumatic first birth.

A mother who is a writer and is writing an article about it.

And, even if she's not writing an article at that point -- I'm considering a home birth I want to hear the whole unvarnished picture of yer home birth perspectives and experiences.

I was reacting to that and to her snide remark about, "I felt like a failure ... But it's not like I had a C-section."

But you don't know that was snide, you can't hear her tone of voice. Maybe she's deriding herself for feeling so shitty even though her friend went through something much worse. Taffy doesn't seem offended.

The experience was scarring. "I felt a sense of failure that I had to call my parents from the hospital," Bialik continues. "Yes, I know vaginal birth in the hospital is the next best thing to a home birth." She considers me, knowing my story. "It's not like when people have a C-section."

I point out that natural childbirth in the hospital — her "failure" — was my best-case scenario. But I also understand when she says, "Everyone is allowed her own sense of loss." She realized her vision when her second son was born at home

I honestly don't know how Blayik intended that statement -- as presented, I can't get a good sense of tone; it's ambiguous, to me.

ETA: and xpost with Trudy.

But you don't know that was snide, you can't hear her tone of voice.

I think if you'd had a C-section, and dealt with a lot of moms who treated you like you'd let down their side, and were somehow not really part of the club, you might feel differently about that.