One for the ages:
javachick:
Yes, as I told a drunk Cleveland Indian who was hitting on me at the Hilton in Anaheim a few years back: "I don't do married, I don't do American League and I sure as hell don't do designated hitters."
Doesn't matter that we took him off that boat, Shepherd, it's the place he's going to live from now on.
Mal ,'Bushwhacked'
Coffee On My Monitor Again
This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.
brenda m - Apr 13, 2010 4:43:37 pm PDT #420 of 1328
If you're going through hell/keep on going/don't slow down/keep your fear from showing/you might be gone/'fore the devil even knows you're there
Polter-Cow - Apr 13, 2010 4:47:07 pm PDT #421 of 1328
What else besides ramen can you scoop? YOU CAN SCOOP THIS WORLD FROM DARKNESS!
And the follow-up:
javachik:
The funniest part was when I returned home and told my friend Robyn and she was like "Travis Hafner?? But he's hitting like .340!" or something. And I was like "he struck out that night."
Tom Scola - Apr 18, 2010 11:31:30 am PDT #422 of 1328
Mr. Scola’s wardrobe by Botany 500
The less context the better:
Steph L: It was like a Buffista F2F, until the beatings started.
aurelia - Apr 20, 2010 11:55:31 am PDT #423 of 1328
All sorrows can be borne if you put them into a story. Tell me a story.
Discussing the added costs of flying in Natter...
Frankenbuddha: Isn't travelling without any bags now considered suspicious behavior?
Vortex: So, now there's a new game -- terrorist or cheapskate?
Steph L.: Man, I miss gay or Eurotrash.
Calli - Apr 21, 2010 10:33:43 am PDT #424 of 1328
I must obey the inscrutable exhortations of my soul—Calvin and Hobbs
In Natter, helping new parents deal with sleeping issues the way only buffistas can:
Amy: have a martini
amych: To be safe, have a shot of clear liquor, possibly with some sort of vermouth in some proportion, possibly with a garnish. Unless definitional discussions help you get through the sleepless nights, in which case have a martini.
Amy - Apr 27, 2010 3:11:24 pm PDT #425 of 1328
Because books.
Aims in Bitches, in response to askye's "THE GOVERNMENT IS TOO BIG":
Yes, but it's small enough to fit in my cooch, apparently.
Not funny, really, and yet.
billytea - Apr 27, 2010 4:35:29 pm PDT #426 of 1328
You were a wrong baby who grew up wrong. The wrong kind of wrong. It's better you hear it from a friend.
Steph L. in Natter:
Yeah, when I think about it, I'm not exactly beaming with pride that my mother tongue can claim "ginormous."
WindSparrow - May 03, 2010 7:47:11 am PDT #427 of 1328
Love is stronger than death and harder than sorrow. Those who practice it are fierce like the light of stars traveling eons to pierce the night.
Gudanov, in Bitches, on how to deal with noisy neighbors:
Nothing is more intimidating than a live performance of the 1812 Overture, though the direction in which the canons are pointing is an important variable.
Jessica - May 03, 2010 8:37:06 am PDT #428 of 1328
If I want to become a cloud of bats, does each bat need a separate vaccination?
erika on AZ's anti-cloning law:
AZ; Suddenly, that cloning law makes more sense...they know what can happen. They already made a governor out of a horse's ass.
amych - May 06, 2010 5:41:07 pm PDT #429 of 1328
Now let us crush something soft and watch it fountain blood. That is a girlish thing to want to do, yes?
Modern dating, as explained in Natter:
-t: Dude, your phone is totally trying to cockblock you. That ain't right.
tommyrot: Suddenly I understand why they call it "Virgin Mobile."