When I was renting I was always acutely aware that my landlord was allowing me to live in a house or apartment that was not really mine. I like owning, even though it doesn't make a whole lot of financial sense (especially the way property values have dropped since I bought, sigh).

I love owning, even if it does gobble up time and money. Tax benefits are great, but the best part is being able to futz around with the house and yard. Geeky house stuff like putting in attic insulation is very satisfying to me. Researching and planning and doing stuff to the house is my hobby, really.

I have a love/hate relationship with owning.

I should regret buying this place when we did (and buying without having sold the old house previously), but I do love my block all to hell (the neighbors across the street throw awesome parties), and I love my house, and if we ever unload the old place, we will recognize that the payments on this place aren't bad. At the time, they weren't much more than renting a comparable place.

Speaking of owning, our annual block party is tonight. It's great fun, especially since the couple who own this place [link] live two houses down. I love that our neighborhood has people of all ages and nationalities.

I hate gardening. I thought I would like it, but somehow forgot that it involves being outside in the sun and dealing with bugs. My black thumb is offset by the fact that we live in a reclaimed bog, and everything grows like crazy here. Our climbing rose in front of the house is making another attempt to reach the power lines.

Hmm. Interesting timing for the house conversation. I was just coming here to pick the hivemind.

How, I wonder, does one indicate to one's so that one is thinking "Hey, maybe we should live together!" without freaking him out? I'm there 4 or 5 nights, we would both save some money, and we get along together really well. And, yo, I'm in love with him.

I feel ready. It's been 6 months -- is it too soon? I've never had to negotiate this kind of emotional thing before - I'm really fumbling, and I don't want to dick anything up.

(why do I feel like I'm writing into Cosmo?!)

I'm just looking for some thoughts. I loves me the analysis.

Erin, I don't know the answer, but I am terribly happy for you that you've gotten to this point. :)

I can easily spend a third to half of my weekend doing basic upkeep chores around the place. I love it, and get a lot of satisfaction from it, but still...

I do this and I rent a house. I'd actually like to buy this house one day, so who knows. I get along very well with my landlady (I am the first person renting this place--she moved in with her boyfriend) and she's already talked about selling it to me. I love puttering around cleaning, fixing and gardening. I have a whole list of stuff I'd do if I bought it (including turning the garage into an office/guest room).

6 months sounds like too soon to me unless there are practical considerations like a lease coming up for renewal.

Erin, I don't know the answer, but I am terribly happy for you that you've gotten to this point. :)

wait, can I change my answer? I may be commitment phobic.

Has he given any kinds of hints or openings, Erin?

Have any long term plans been bruited about? Because you can usually gauge from those when to open this topic.

Erin, I would just ask. But learn to follow up after the first answer. When I was in the same circumstances and brought this up to the DH, his answer was that he "didn't think it was a good idea." When I picked my heart off the floor and finally asked why, and he said, "Well, this place is so small, where would we put our books and clothes? I just moved in as I don't want to have to move again so soon" So, his issue wasn't the living together but the practicality of it--and he ended up having a captain's bed built so I would have room for my clothes and we cohabited very nicely thenkyewverymuch.