Oh, is Dana around? I finished Murder in Chinatown last night, and just realized the most racist thing (which is spoilery for the ending, in case there is anyone else who cares): The (Lady Bountiful) woman from the mission says she knows a Chinese man didn't kill Angel, because the Chinese are too meek or whatever -- and of course it turns out it wasn't a Chinese man after all. But CHRIST, since when are the Chinese actually less bloodthirsty as a people than anyone else???

I just watched President Obama fill in his Presidential Bracket on ESPN. He said he's going to try to catch as many games as possible between the NATO summit. Airforce One apparently has Direct TV. I loves my president.

I have no good, clean jokes.

DH had a problematic direct report call him this morning to complain about a report being "stolen" off his desk. DH told him to call security. Apparently the report was unflattering to the sales force (which falls under DH's purview). The sales manager later calls DH (his boss) to say that someone sent this report, anonymously to the CEO of the company. Coincidence?

I find the Gaslight mysteries about two steps short of actually being good. They're kind of "look at my infodump! I researched all these things!", while being slightly predictable and simplistic.

But I got suckered in by the damn romance, so I keep getting them from the library.

I just microwaved a bowl of curry, and when I took it out and stirred it, something exploded. Possibly a potato.

Anyone have a funny, but cleanish joke?

This is sort of a kid joke. What is dead 100 feet in the air? A dead centipede.

How many country western singers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Five, one to actually screw in the bulb and four to sing about how much they'll miss the old one.

Colbert Announces Trip To Persian Gulf (VIDEO)

Stephen Colbert announced last night that he will be taking his show on the road, broadcasting from the Persian Gulf. Where you ask? He's not allowed to tell us, but "there will be sand and people that wish we would leave." When? He can't tell us that either, but it will be at some point in the "near or distant future or past."

Colbert answered the challenge of the members of the 153rd Regiment who asked him to "come on over."

As he told the Stars and Stripes military blog:

"I'm hoping they're just going to blindfold me, fly the plane around in the air for 12 hours and drop me in New Mexico and tell me it's the Persian Gulf, because I wouldn't know the difference."

Anyone have a funny, but cleanish joke?

Also a kids joke:

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD!

You are totally right, Dana. I read a lot of crap, so. And I just stopped reading a different book half-way, which I never do, but it was so fucking boring! For a mystery with a decent body count, it was shocking how nothing happened in that book.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?

I've heard that one.

I love jokes that little kids make up. Here's one that a five-ish-year-old told me:

"Why did the man sit behind the cow? Because he wanted to get kicked!"

What did Jeffrey Dahmer say to Lorena Bobbit? Are you done with that?

It's all I got.