I can't figure out how to hold his body with one hand, open his mouth with another, and work the spray bottle with a ...third?

How the hell do I spray something in his mouth?

The only way I can do something like that is if I wait for my cat to meow. When I had to give her liquid antibiotic when she had her teeth cleaned, I would pick her up, wait for her to start bitching in protest, then shove the eyedropper into her mouth and squeeze. By the end of the week, she stopped complaining as much, which made it harder for me to give her her medicine.

I was afraid that was the answer. He's not much of a meower. I've been trying to figure out if anything I do makes him yawn, like how when I scratch by his tail, he starts licking his leg. No luck so far.

I used to grab Percy by the scruff and wait for the mouth to open

Spray? Wait for a yawn?

You're ahead of me on that one. We used to make our dog sneeze by imitating his sneeze. Maybe you should yawn.

alternative: grab the cat - get down on the ground, hold the cat between my knees and force the mouth open with one hand . yeah, I sat on the cat.

Plus -- after giving any medication I gave a treat. Didn't calm the cat, but the protest was more minimal

Drat, I already brushed him, which is his favorite thing. OK, I'll give it another go.

I'd make sure the spray was easily accessible, wrap him tightly in a towel, and hold the bundle next to me with my left arm. With my left hand close by his mouth, I'd open his jaw with my right hand, have the left hand take over mouth duty, and grab the spray and spray it with my right. You can force open his mouth by pressing on the jaw joint.

I think I got it! I just held him and poked at his mouth with the spray, and kind of sprayed it in at the side. Possibly not the optimal amount of benefit to his teeth, but whatever. I haven't had them cleaned in 5 years, and the vet said they weren't too bad.

You can make a cat open his mouth by holding him under one arm, putting your fingers on both sides of his upper jaw and pushing the skin and gums down so that if the cat tries to bite, he bites himself. You have to be fast, and the cat usually gets in at least one swipe with a back paw.

It took me about five minutes to write that, and it still doesn't make sense. A vet showed me.

I remember being threatened that my father would spank me when he got home, but I don't recall that he ever did. The threat terrified me, though. From about 2 to 4, I kept doing things in stores that caused my mother to drag me out with one hand clamped around my elbow and the other swatting my butt. Apparently I once lay on my back in the middle of a rather fancy store and said "Hi" to everyone who had to step over or around me. Once I turned off an escalator. There were buttons. They were near the floor. How could I resist?