That's a tough one, Vortex. DW's mom has those moments as well and it really frustrates DW. No real advice, just letting you know you are not alone in dealing with this situation.

Vortex, it sounds more to me like your mom just wants company. It's not that she expects you to do things for her, but to be there with her. Maybe you could set up a regularly scheduled parental date night? That way she knows she's got your undivided attention at least on those days?

sj, if I'm understanding you correctly, you asked someone to dinner and they responded "sure, I'll bring a lasagna" or something of that sort? Yeah, that's kind of weird.

Vortex, it sounds to me that your mom is lonely and probably at least a little depressed. There may be nothing that you can do to truly please her at this point, but it might help if you call and make plans to see her before she calls you. It could make her feel more wanted than when she calls you. I'm sorry you're in such a difficult situation.

Brenda, are you spying on my e-mail, because it was exactly that. I don't know why I was being cryptic except I worry that people will find me here through facebook. I just find it weird because I make the Italian food, you know? And I'm obviously going to make the main dish for a dinner I am hosting. Family is fun, no?

ION, I was told in THREE separate official emails that nobody in my division will be getting a raise this year and we should be thankful that at least we're not going out of business entirely. OH YAY.

"Management would further like to stress that back in Management's day Management had to walk uphill both ways to school in sixteen feet of snow with no boots and fend off starved and crazed grizzly bears with a spiral notebook that was missing the spiral.

Management understands that this news (re: lack of a raise) is disappointing to some. To stress that this is actually a positive step in comparison to other outcomes in this difficult economic climate, Management is instituting a 'You Think *This* Is Rough?!' program, wherein management will come to each individual employee's work area, kick the employee in the crotch, point and laugh the required two (2) 'Ha's and then spit on the employee's neck.

Please consult the attached schedule and be prepared for your visit by Management.

Here's looking forward to a better 2nd quarter!

Human Resources."

God bless all the happy in love people. Enjoy the bright and bubbly while it lasts, there's not enough silly joy in the world.

Apparently a cruise liner and a freighter got caught in the ice on the St. Laurence River, and then the Coast Guard ice ship got caught as well. Who goes crusing on Mid-American waters when the Arctic Express is running? I know the song "Wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald," I know the middle part of the continent freezes solid in winter. I am not one who would say, "I know! Let's go boating in January in the Great Lakes Region! Remember to pack the dog teams!"

To stress that this is actually a positive step in comparison to other outcomes in this difficult economic climate, Management is instituting a 'You Think *This* Is Rough?!' program, wherein management will come to each individual employee's work area, kick the employee in the crotch, point and laugh the required two (2) 'Ha's and then spit on the employee's neck.

They'd just better not take away our Friday bagels. There will be riots.

Management would also like to remind you that, while your bid to defeat our puppet presidential candidate was successful, if your puppet president tries to tax us, or take our money in any way, we will cease employing anyone anywhere, fire everyone in this country, and give your jobs to penguins in Antarctica.

In fact, we may do this anyway, unless he continues to give us money by the truckload. Tax money. Your money. So please continue to pay us for the privelege of having a job, or we'll take everyone's job away. And we may do that anyway.

...

...or did that get a little off topic?

Also, the pizza we ordered for lunch has not arrived yet. I hereby declare today to be REALLY REALLY SUCKY.