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Spike? It's you. It's really you! My therapist thought I was holding on to false hope, but…I knew you'd come back. You're like…you're like Gandalf the White, resurrected from the pit of the Balrog, more beautiful than ever. Oh…he's alive Frodo. He's alive.

Andrew ,'Damage'

Spike's Bitches 42: Which question do you want me to answer first?

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[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.

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Sean K - Aug 15, 2008 10:46:43 am PDT #1840 of 10001

You can't leave me to my own devices; my devices are Nap and Eat. -Zenkitty

So S comes back from Texas tonight. This will be the first time I've seen her in about two weeks.

The next few weeks and months are just going to suck. I know I've hurt her and broken her heart worse than anybody ever has. It sucks. I care about her enough that I just want to hold her, and make everything better.

But I can't give her what she wants, which is for me to be happy in a relationship with her, and want to stay.

I really wish things hadn't turned out like this. It makes me very sad, for both of us.

Nora Deirdre - Aug 15, 2008 10:52:19 am PDT #1841 of 10001

I’m responsible for my own happiness? I can’t even be responsible for my own breakfast! (Bojack Horseman)

{{Sean}} I'm sorry. How long are you two going to be living together? Because that is (obviously) going to make everything harder for both of you...

Sean K - Aug 15, 2008 11:09:31 am PDT #1842 of 10001

You can't leave me to my own devices; my devices are Nap and Eat. -Zenkitty

Unknown. It's probably going to be at least mid-September before I can actually afford a deposit on a new apartment.

At this point, I suspect I'm going to have to find a roommate, or a room in an occupied apartment.

Sean K - Aug 15, 2008 11:10:45 am PDT #1843 of 10001

You can't leave me to my own devices; my devices are Nap and Eat. -Zenkitty

On the other hand, I'm hoping it will give us both a chance to make peace with it.

Laga - Aug 15, 2008 11:12:51 am PDT #1844 of 10001

You should know I'm a big deal in the Resistance.

peace~ma to you both, Sean.

brenda m - Aug 15, 2008 11:16:40 am PDT #1845 of 10001

If you're going through hell/keep on going/don't slow down/keep your fear from showing/you might be gone/'fore the devil even knows you're there

Oh, Sean. I'm so sorry for you both.

juliana - Aug 15, 2008 11:18:43 am PDT #1846 of 10001

I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I miss them all tonight…

It's probably going to be at least mid-September before I can actually afford a deposit on a new apartment.

{{{Sean}}} I've done that twice now (last time was for 6 weeks, right before I moved here). It's not easy, but I'm sure you'll do your best to make it... okay.

Sean K - Aug 15, 2008 11:21:26 am PDT #1847 of 10001

You can't leave me to my own devices; my devices are Nap and Eat. -Zenkitty

I just really hate having to cause so much hurt for someone I care about.

Daisy Jane - Aug 15, 2008 11:27:32 am PDT #1848 of 10001

"This bar smells like kerosene and stripper tears."

Just keep on focusing on how much healthier this is going to be in the long run. I mean acknowledge the hurt (for both you and her, because Bob knows that when I've been hurt the last thing I want is someone telling me it's for the best). But maybe you can keep the other part in mind for your own mental health.

Miracleman - Aug 15, 2008 11:35:06 am PDT #1849 of 10001

No, I don't think I will - me, quoting Captain Steve Rogers, to all of 2020

I am SO! BORED!

Which has nothing to do with Sean (sorry, dude), but I just need to yell that. Even virtually.

SO! FUCKING! BORED!

Thankfully, I get to go home in thirteen minutes.

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