We'll be in our bunk.

Wash ,'War Stories'


Spike's Bitches 39: Cuppa Tea, Cuppa Tea, Almost Got Shagged, Cuppa Tea...  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


Nora Deirdre - Feb 19, 2008 7:17:36 am PST #7010 of 10001
I’m responsible for my own happiness? I can’t even be responsible for my own breakfast! (Bojack Horseman)

Stabby stabby fucking death stabby.

The friend of the family that died just after Thanksgiving? My dad's best friend? His widow just died today (also a close friend of the family of course). Of a stroke.

stabby stabby stab stab


DavidS - Feb 19, 2008 7:18:02 am PST #7011 of 10001
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

Thanks for sharing that Bonny. That's such a useful perspective. It's clear that you've dealt with your issues around your history and the nature of your work you've had to very consciously confront them. But it is still brave to broach that kind of thing in a public forum and I always admire the willingness to bring a personal story like that into such a loaded issue.

I know I've benefited from Buffistas like Cashmere who've spoken at length about her brother's mental illness and others who've talked about their experience with rape and assault.

So, thank you.


amych - Feb 19, 2008 7:19:58 am PST #7012 of 10001
Now let us crush something soft and watch it fountain blood. That is a girlish thing to want to do, yes?

Crap, {{Nora}}

Bonny, I can't improve on what David said, but I'll add my thanks -- for your constant honesty even more than for the specifics.


d - Feb 19, 2008 7:20:09 am PST #7013 of 10001
It's nice to see some brave pretenders trying to make it interesting.

Happy Birthday, Beverly!

{{{Nora}}}


Glamcookie - Feb 19, 2008 7:20:13 am PST #7014 of 10001
I know my own heart and understand my fellow man. But I am made unlike anyone I have ever met. I dare to say I am like no one in the whole world. - Anne Lister

I agree with Hec. Thank you for sharing your story, bonny. You are strong as hell!


Nora Deirdre - Feb 19, 2008 7:26:35 am PST #7015 of 10001
I’m responsible for my own happiness? I can’t even be responsible for my own breakfast! (Bojack Horseman)

Thanks for sharing that Bonny. That's such a useful perspective. It's clear that you've dealt with your issues around your history and the nature of your work you've had to very consciously confront them. But it is still brave to broach that kind of thing in a public forum and I always admire the willingness to bring a personal story like that into such a loaded issue.

Yes. This. Thank you.


Vortex - Feb 19, 2008 7:28:42 am PST #7016 of 10001
"Cry havoc and let slip the boobs of war!" -- Miracleman

I've thought about making a Gimme More one with just the intro ("It's Britney, bitch!"), just cause it makes me laugh.

I laugh every time my friend L calls. I sometimes answer with "It's Stephanie, bitch!" Which makes her laugh.


Frankenbuddha - Feb 19, 2008 7:30:07 am PST #7017 of 10001
"We are the Goon Squad and we're coming to town...Beep! Beep!" - David Bowie, "Fashion"

Oh Christ, Nora! Not another. Sorry to hear that.


beekaytee - Feb 19, 2008 7:30:41 am PST #7018 of 10001
Compassionately intolerant

Bless you for that Hec.

But while I appreciate the appreciation...goodness knows I take pride in my emotional courage...what I wish is that it didn't TAKE so much courage in our culture to simply speak this truth.

I, and none like me, should ever have felt ashamed to talk about it. Or to grieve publicly so as to move on. NOT doing so is what contributes to the problem.

I will tell you the defining moment in my life. Well, frankly there have been many defining moments and this particular one was facilitated by my wonderful DEXH who taught me what it meant to be loved for something other than what a man could do to your body. (It's directly because of him I have a healthy sex life...that man deserves angel wings.)

After years of heeding my father's daily admonitions of: 'talk and I'll kill you and besides no one will believe you (which tragically turned out to be true too many times) I went to a therapist who recommended an adult survivors of abuse group.

It was horrible, but I went. Long story shorter, during the third session, an older, bitter, angry woman I felt really sorry for was speaking. I thought to myself, wow, we really need to help her. She's new at this and is so overcome by her pain she can't even live.' As I'm thinking this, I tune back into what she's saying... "I've been coming to this group for ten years and I..."

I'd love to tell you the rest of what she said, but I had fallen hysterically deaf. No lie. I couldn't hear a thing. I reached under my chair, picked up my stuff and walked out, never to return. At 20 something, I declared that that would NEVER be me.

Support groups are a wonderful thing...especially when you are getting started on healing. But what, too often they can do is support you in staying where you are. I can't support that...pun entirely intended.

When the 'undamaged' people (at least in THAT particular realm of damage) can comfortably hear what goes on...that we'd rather not have going on...less of it will go on!

Which is another reason why this community rocks. IJS.

eta: in retrospect, I feel a need to clarify that what I object to is the ghetto-ization of support. We, as a culture, don't want to hear about it because it's too creepy or painful or whatever. While I'd never press the details of my experience on anyone...I respect other's limits as I'd have mine respected...I just wish we didn't LET the truth hurt us.


Susan W. - Feb 19, 2008 7:34:07 am PST #7019 of 10001
Good Trouble and Righteous Fights

Also echoing Hec.

This topic actually came up, kinda, at my church on Sunday. We're doing a sermon series on the Gospel of Mark, and the text was one where Jesus offends religious people by hanging out with sinners and outcasts, and the pastor was reminding us that we need to look at the story from the perspective of the religious people and not just assume that we're on Jesus' side. He was listing outcast groups, some of which our church already works with, and then said something like, "And currently the most absolute outcasts in our culture are registered sex offenders. Maybe we as a church need to consider what the message of Jesus would be to them."

I have to admit my gut reaction was, "OK, Jeff, theologically I see your point, but I have a kid in this church."

He then made a crack about how in Seattle maybe all you'd have to do to reach out to the outcast would be to invite a Republican to dinner. The relieved laughter echoed around the sanctuary.