Who here got spanked by their parents?

Never. When i did something wrong they would sit me down between them and take turns talking at me endlessly about how it was wrong and why. I remember begging my mother to please just spank me and get it over with, which just prolonged the lecture by adding another 45 minutes of why physical violence is never the best way to solve anything.

In retrospect i have to admire that kind of stamina. Who has that sort of time?

I'm not entirely sure how I'm going to make it through the interview, honestly.

I think I'm going to need you all to make porn jokes here in my honor for two hours this Thursday.

If anyone can do it, Shrift, its us.

I mean, if you are going to be funnylooking any place on your body, your privates is the best place for it! They're privates!

But maybe your privates wants to be corporals?

I'm sorry, I really don't know why my mind went that way.

We're proud to take up that challenge, shrift.

This has been a rotten day. A thing that I expected to take 20 minutes took five freakin' hours because everything possible was wrong, and as a result I am five hours behinder than I was behind before.

Not to mention, but I will, the one person here who is completely clueless about her computer - she knows the steps to take to do what she needs to do, she does not understand why they work and thus cannot extrapolate - is even more lost now with the new system, and it seems I'm the only one who has the patience to help her. Helping her is not easy, because when told anything she doesn't immediately understand (like, "highlight that word and copy it"), she begins to whine loudly (no, really, whine, like, oooohhnnnOOOOoooo!) I have a headache and 30 papers to complete by Wednesday morning. This is not happening.

Okay, I'm done. Off to the gym.

I can remember being spanked once, so clearly my parents spanked occasionally. But I can't recall how old I was or why I was spanked, only that it didn't happen often. And I can remember the last time any of the kids in the house were spanked. It was my sister. Right before he did it, my dad said, "this will hurt me more than it hurts you." And then he broke a blood vessel in his thumb.

Thus ended the spanking.

As for my kids, I haven't spanked them, but they are wee things and not likely to respond well to it. Punishment takes the form of time outs and privileges withheld.

I was just getting pizza, and thought I'd grab a beer, too, but it turned out it was going to be $4, which seemed excessive, even for a Peroni. The guy said it was because they have a restaurant licence, not a deli (or whatever) licence, which, huh. He was like, yeah, don't worry about it, go to the deli. So I got a Magic Hat for two bucks at the deli. More like it! Although I do always feel a little bit trashy buying a single beer.

Whoot! I just learned that I've almost sold my print run...in three months!

Woohoo, Allyson!

Yay!