Cash is gorgeous! And Lori looks so much like you! I'm so glad you had a good time.

Sparkly pink PopTarts:

All kinds of calming ~ma for Jilli.

Much calm to you, Jilli (and an extra gentle reminder that you have expressed somewhat similar feelings before meeting with your boss; don't let the work image demons eat your brain).

Tons of calm~ma and meeting~ma, Jilli.

Cashmere, you look gorgeous in those pictures!

Mmmmmm, cantaloupes. Um. Yes.

Pretty pictures, Cash! Your eyes continue to floor me, and I love that dress.

People go batfuck insane during divorces and separations.

This is very true.

Calm~ma and hairpats for Jilli.

Calm~ma and meeting~ma for Jilli.

calm ma~~ Jilli.

lovely , Cass.

My parents had some of their worst fights ever when building their retirement house. As in at one point my dad decicde that all the counters should be wheelchair height - so my mom could cook him dinner. to my mom's indigent question " where will you be" , his answer was " lost in the hall" . Of course the best one was when they were going to build a deck like thing at the top of the stairs down to water. Just before my dad bought the lumber they realized that neither one of them wanted the deck.

Thank you for all the ~ma, folks. It worked. I did not get upset or stressed during the meeting. It was mostly my boss checking in on me because of various things that happened last week which undermined any confidence I had in my work. My boss reassured me that I'm doing a good job, and that she is going to try and be around to be a manager more often. (For the past six months, she has Not Been Here, because she's been in meetings all day, every day. There hasn't been a lot of managerial support, feedback, or information lately.)

We talked about some training and classes I might want to look into, and I said that I am planning on talking to my doctor about ways to deal with stress, because spending most of a week on the verge of a panic attack was not something I wanted to repeat.

Which leads me to a kinda-odd question: what do people do when they're in the middle of deadlines at work and feel overwhelmed enough to snap? I really did spend most of last week trying to fend off panic attacks, and I want to figure out how to not have it happen again.

Jilli, I make sure to (a) take lunch and (b) do something soothing over lunch--get a pedicure, go to barnes and noble and read a hardback for an hour, sit in the sunshine, whatever (clearly, these may not be your choices of "soothing"). Alternately, have plans that you can look forward to after work that are soothing/relaxing/take your mind off work ("OK, if I can just get to Tuesday night, I have a massage scheduled!" Or whatever). Or reward yourself with some shopping?

Jilli, the absolutely most effective thing for me is Ativan. I realize that's not an optimal solution for a lot of people (and in fact I don't use it that much), but it cuts right through that loop and lets me focus in on what's necessary.

My other coping strategy is working out in the middle of the day, even if I have to get to work an hour earlier in order to get everything in a place to allow me to leave for an hour.