I second Cindy's suggestion, and add the suggestion of buying popsicles, which have the double benefits of cooling you off and getting liquids into you.

But not pushing on through *doesn't* equal malingering/coddling/enabling. And -- please correct me if I'm wrong -- I get the feeling that you think that it *does.*

People process their feelings in different ways. Though, of course, they'd all be better off if they did it my way.

As several people noted upthread, you have to find your own personal balance between articulating your feelings (which for me is a necessary part of understanding them. My feelings are often not clear to me until I put them in words), and creating bad habits which actually reinforce the problem. I think everybodys balance point on that is pretty fluid. But I do think it is something that everybody should be cognizant about.

I think lisah's comment about recommitting to not complaining is an excellent example of having a personal check. You're conscious of your own tendencies and have a cognitive approach to catching and correcting yourself.

Which, when I'm unable to shrug off a stressor, makes me feel like I'm a malingering failure for not being able to push on through.

Yeah, but you worry about that more than is probably necessary. You're fairly Tough Guy in your attitudes sometimes and you see being wimpy/whiny/complainy as a huge negative. Far from your ideal self.

But you only really complain (in a "complainy" way) about Chatty!Coworker, and frankly that's amusing to me.

Just got off the phone with the doctor, and he is not recommending we go into the hospital at this time. But he did reiterate most of what's been said here.

He also suggested one extra strength Tylonol twice a day, but we're both a little leery of that (as is our doctor, actually, but the other option for fever reducing is Ibuprofin, which can cause bleeding, and she definitely can't have that right now), as Tylonol is processed in the liver.

But I'm less worried now, having talked to him. It is a high fever, and part of me wonders if my temp would have been almost as high without the Advil I was taking.

How is your mom, by the way?

She's doing great. It turns out that the nodes on her thyroid were probably not cancerous, but better safe than sorry.

Current kid-related earworm.....

Gotta be a boooooooyyyyy!

frankly that's amusing to me.

You mock my pain!!! (Is that from a movie? It sounds like it is, but I can't recall if it is, and if so, which movie.)

You're fairly Tough Guy in your attitudes sometimes

Only because I assume that people won't be understanding if I *am* complainy.

and you see being wimpy/whiny/complainy as a huge negative.

Well, because I've been told it is.

As, for instance, I'm not dealing well at all with this latest round of Too Much Stress. [NB: I haven't shared all of it here, because it's extremely personal, and it doesn't belong here, nor do I feel comfortable sharing it.] [And I didn't just say that to be all coy and "I've got a secret"; I just wanted to try to give the whole picture that there's more stress going on than just sick!Dad and fucked-up!mean!Group President.]

And I did, in fact, go to the doctor last week and ask for Ativan. Which is helping, nominally. Enough that I don't feel like screaming all the time.

But who really wants to hear about my stress, you know? I should be used to my dad's constant hospital trips by now, and I should just shut the hell up about the group and resign already. Anything else I could say is just whining. Which is a bad pattern.

Cindy's Nana is wise. I say that all the time now to remind myself this is how it is.

How soon will you be here, Raq?

I'm shooting for 1 May. I'd like to start my next job earlier, but I have to work in a few trips first.

lisah, I love B'more, but the commute is a killer, especially to downtown DC. We thought about taking the train, but it takes so long and costs so much it's really not an option.

OK, I have to go make phone calls and dinner and yoga. I'm babysitting Mal's GF Friday as her mother will be having child #2, so I have to retrofit the house for a 15-month-old also.

{{{Teppy}}} I'm not sure anyone really gets used to someone they love constantly having health problems. I'm sorry you have been under so much stress.

You mock my pain!!! (Is that from a movie? It sounds like it is, but I can't recall if it is, and if so, which movie.)

It's from Princess Bride.

~ma and hugs for everyone, because I am Captain Read-And-Not-Respond. /shamed

Anything else I could say is just whining. Which is a bad pattern.

Like I said, this concern about whining is more your issue than the community's issue. You (more than most people) need to allow yourself to let down and be Not Strong and that you could use some support.

You're letting your Tough Girl self image get in the way of the things that you need emotionally.

You mock my pain!!! (Is that from a movie? It sounds like it is, but I can't recall if it is, and if so, which movie.)

It's from Princess Bride.

Really, I was thinking more of John Malkovich on SNL. "The Moon mocks me..."