For what it's worth, my apologies to those who feel I betrayed them for mentioning that there were LJs out there where this subject had been discussed.

As for the rest of this, I have not changed my position from what I said several hundred posts ago, and I can see that other positions remain unchanged. I like you all so much that I'm going over to Bitches now (um, not in a shunning manner, I'm just going to see who's there that I can trade innuendos with).

The problem with all the "talking it out" is not that it gets repetitious, but that it gets nasty. And A stompy saying "I have the info to make a decision" probably would not stop someone from posting if they just needed to vent. But it might prevent the continuous attempt to persuade when all the arguments have already been made. Anyway - not going to insist on it.

I'm just with Allyson on wishing that when someone acts really troll-like that people would not worry about whether a person might be trainable. This board requires the minimal social skills not to be offensive too often, and to apologize when they are. It might even let people slide by with one out of two. . I don't think we are being mean to ask that to stay on the board, you either meet that standard, or go away and get trained somewhere else until you do.

My apologies to those who felt I was insulting them - that was never my intention.

Gandalfe, apology accepted. I know emotions are running high and you have family stuff going on. I was probably reading more into your posts than were there.

Giving up a hundred posts back...

Reading this whole thing is making my head hurt.

A warning is something you get from a beat cop when you are annoying another citizen. it doesn't go on your record, it's just a societal aside.

"Hey, buddy knock it off." and the cop forgets about it.

That's it. The beat cop doesn't wonder and worry and think "What if that man was ill, or mentally unbalanced?" He says it because in a land of rules, one was getting kind of trampled on and he didn't really want to run the guy in.

It's what you type, not what you mean to type that we can judge. If someone chooses to get hurt by this, that's too bad. I have be rudely slammed by someone online, and I was hurt but i got over it.

However, we can't spend hundreds of posts on such minutia, as it will drive more people away by the mere fact of the amount of time devoted to this.

Give the warning, and if she objects, apologize for offending, and say "we have rules here,' this is just a simple aside to tell you we're concerned."

In fact, make it that. Stop using the word "warning" if it is seen as too harsh. Call it, a "note" or some other euphemism that will make more feel better.

Make the first one a more neutral tone:

"Hi, ____!

Just a quick note that you seem to be treading on some people's toes. This isn't a warning or anything drastic like that, but could you watch what you type for a while? Some people are getting pretty uncomfortable and we'd like to avoid that, wound't you? I mean, we'd hate to be giving you a warning or something alarming like that. Although a warning would't be all that bad, as you'd have to really screw up to get a real punishment like banning or something. So, consider this just a note from a cop on the beat telling you to watch it a bit, and we won't have to have this chat again. I know this might have offended you, but we really are just trying to make this place a more friendly community."

Buffistas admins"

---

That's it. Something like that.

Meanwhile all this talk-talk is freaking out some of the long-timers and it is not good for the digestion.

If someone has covered this in the last 175 posts, sorry for the inconvenience, carry on.

A warning is something you get from a beat cop when you are annoying another citizen. it doesn't go on your record, it's just a societal aside.

Technically, an official warning DOES go on your record.

The Nutty Asstastic Suggestion from earlier, IIRC, does not.

Roughly 200 posts ago, Nou wrote:

I wonder if victor and jengod gave up Stomping because they didn't want to have to make the decision, "I'm going to send the official warning. It's my call that enough of us agree." (I always wondered why they resigned, because the white-fonting duties of Stomping didn't seem high pressure.)

Won't speak for Jengod, but Victor resigned because he works ridiculous hours at one newspaper, writes columns for two others, writes for two Web sites and is eating what's left of his so-called personal time by working an extra 40 hours a week trying to launch a new magazine, which involves trying to secure 2.5 million dollars in funding for a project that doesn't exist outside my head, coordinating 30 people spread across the United States and Canada, all of whom are working on vague promises of a paycheck if--and only if--the whole thing doesn't go up in flames, and consistently postponing appointments with his impending nervous breakdown. Victor's a little tired these days.

Technically, an official warning DOES go on your record.

I guess an officeal write-up warning would. I was thinking of the colloquial "I'm warning you buddy," I guess.

t shrug sorry.

Wow, victor. Like some chaos with your anarchy, do you? All that and ferrets. I wouldn't have pried into your reasons, if it weren't for the simultaneity with jengod that made me curious.

which involves trying to secure 2.5 million dollars in funding for a project that doesn't exist outside my head

huh. this sounds all very interesting to the Make-Shit-Happen part of my brain.