Hi people, weighing in on the Zoe thing. I know we can't really make expceptions for people, but I'm starting to think she's, well, special. She receives disability payments and has mentioned other things that make me think she may not quite filter reality or express herself the way others do.

I know the things she says do get annoying, but if you read them with that perspective, they become less annoying.

IMHO, of course. Ignoring works pretty well, too. Or just playing it off.

eta I want to agree with Victor that people also respond to her rudely.

I am feeling conflicted over this. Most of my frustration with Zoe comes out of the fact that her posting is incoherent--or else coherent but bears no relationship to the text--and she does not provide more clarification when requested or make an attempt to improve her communication.

I feel that she is nothing but noise on a board that is generally pretty high on signal.

I also feel that this is not a legislatable offense against board rules. We regulate content, not quality.

There was a filter at People's Forum, and glancing through a couple of LJs of friends, it was clear it was being used and why. When we came back over here, I noticed a few people bemoaning not having the filter.

I would like to remind people that the first rule of backchannel is don't mention backchannel. That goes for people's LJ's, esp. as many of them are group protected posts.

OK, I don't hang out in UnAmerican. But in the boards I've been in, I haven't seen her be rude first. Arguing with the clueless is a mug's game, anyway. I generally don't respond to her, except with an occasional "I wonder what that meant?" to myself.

MARCIE would solve this issue. HostRocket sucks.

This is a very true statement.

Zoe's refusal to apologize when caled on stuff bothers me more than anything else

Perhaps because she doesn't feel like she's done anything to apologize for?

Perhaps because she doesn't feel like she's done anything to apologize for?

But this is a point that's come up before. Sometimes, in order to maintain civility, you have to apologize.

Okay, not "have", because god knows you can't really legislate behavior, but it's easier to say, "Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you" and work it out than to ignore or be snippy and let resentment grow.

UnAmerican: Zoe Finch "All Ogle, No Cash -- It's Not Just Annoying, It's Un-American" Mar 31, 2003 12:02:22 pm EST

To be honest, Zoe's refusal to apologize when called on stuff bothers me more than anything else

I will say, this is the most important part of it all, to me. Allyson was needlessly obnoxious, in that post that one time, but she did apologize when it became clear that the rest of us strenuously objected to her baiting Zoe like that. I never see Zoe apologize.

Yes, it's as reductive and dumb a thing as that for me. Apologies are our friends! Even the mealy-mouthed "I'm sorry you feel that way" kind!

but it's easier to say, "Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you" and work it out than to ignore or be snippy and let resentment grow.

Yes, this. Because if someone asks me "I couldn't make sense of what you just said, could you please explain it?" I would. If someone said "I find what you just said really offensive", I would say "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to offend you" and then hope a cool discussion about it evolved.

I wouldn't ignore their question, I wouldn't say "the people I am talking to understand".

Yes, I think people have gotten snippy with her. But I think that's coming out of a sense of continued frustration.