Hec on his daughter:

Matilda has inherited her mother's fondness for baby toes, and conveniently Matilda comes equipped with them at the end of her own feet. She's been munching on them all week. If I could get her a basket of chocolate feet I would. When I was taking a bath with her the other day she spotted my big toe and her eyes went wide like a hunter spotting a sixteen point buck.

In Bitches:

Erin:

If I ever got married, I would not elope, because I have gone to too many other weddings. Plus, I would want the fancy dress and underwear. And towels. I want showers, and towels. No strippers. Just fluffy, matching towels.

I really don't want a husband. Just the dress, party....and towels.

-t:

I am now picturing Erin's monogrammed towels "Hers" and "Also Hers" and "There is only Her" and "Who the Fuck do you think this belongs to?"

tommyrot:

I am picturing strippers bringing towels to Erin: "Here you go, ma'am. I can take my clothes off if you like."

And then Erin says, "No, that's OK. Go get some more towels."

Erin:

I never thought about monograms, but at least now y'all know what I want on my towels if I ever would get married.

(He can use all the old towels.)

aurelia, in b'crazy. funny 'cause it's so, so true.

I don't see how we can concense on not voting without voting on that. It's bureaucracy, but it's our bureaucracy.

From Bitches:

Daisy: It's also not the sad drinking alone if you are in the bath, primping to go out (or stay in), relaxing after a crap day or watching a sport.

MM: What about staring unseeing at the television?

Daisy: That's between you and the despairing howly voice in your head.

COMMing the wife is always a dicey proposition but really it seems worthy...

JZ: I still can't believe that two years ago she didn't exist, a year ago there was just a possible person, and now there's a full entire human, all known and mysterious, made out of sex and a handful of cells. Humans are so improbable, really.

Cass: I can hear "Sounds of Silence" blaring through the walls. At 2 a.m.

Neighbors have discovered irony.

Kat in Natter:

Good plan? Narcotics and Cupcakes.

Bad plan? Narcotics and Cupcakes then trimming one's bangs.

ita, talking about her mother:

She has a nasty almost-psychic trait I've grown to hate ever since, the morning after I lost my virginity, she called to ask how I was doing and if any of my friends had done anything special for me the day before.

Matt the Bruins fan: Wow. Captain D's must be seasoning its shrimp with crack. I just woke up out of a dream about participating in a NASCAR-type race. And Halle Berry was an old high school friend (yet still the famous actress in present day) who was flirting with me.

I bet somewhere there's a straight redneck who was just shaken to his core by a dream about making out with Ben Browder at a hockey game.

In Bitches, the foibles of dating:

meara: Honestly, having a girlfriend takes too much time--how do I fix that? Without making her feel like it's personal? I know she'll take it personal.

Erin: I like to date people who go out of town a lot. Because then I can see them occasionally. When I want. If I want. In conclusion, I can be meara's LD GF. We'll talk on the phone and never have sex. You can totally cheat on me with other women. It'll be very 60's WASP.

meara: Erin, we should TOTALLY be long-distance dating. :) Though I think ideally I'd be long distance dating someone who was either (a) within driving range, just a little far (5 hours? can't do it spur of the moment one night, but OK for a weekend), or (b) a frequent/cheap plane ride away (Chicago?)

Erin: meara, I'll get right on the moving to Chi bit. And the gay bit. I'll...um...practice? Role-play?! Soon, I swear. Really. Do you still love me? Hold me!