tommyrot: This is what's gonna happen later tonight: Bush will be talking to Carl Rove in the White House. Bush says, "You have failed me for the last time, Carl." Carl screams and runs. He hides in a dark room. But bush uses the heat-sensing pits on his face to locate Carl in complete darkness. Bush unhinges his lower jaw and opens his mouth 180 degrees. Next he expands his mouth, throat and gullet as he swallows Carl whole. Bush then spends the rest of his administration laying around the White House, digesting.

If tommyrot had written "Cheney" instead of "Bush," I'd be in bureaucracy, proposing we change his user name to prophecy_boy.

Commentary on election night. Bittersweet, but so funny:

What was more disturbing was that list of states that have banned gay marriage.

Matt the Bruins Fan:
I say we pull out, and make them cut their own hair, grow their own flowers, and cater their own damn weddings that would then be decorated in appalling colors by the straight wedding planners.

billytea:

Yeah. Last therapy visit, I added up my stress sources over the last year. It equalled the stress from 3.8 deaths of spouses.

Not only am I having a rough year, the only people who understand my pain are in certain breakaway sects in Utah.

billytea: Yeah. Last therapy visit, I added up my stress sources over the last year. It equalled the stress from 3.8 deaths of spouses.

Not only am I having a rough year, the only people who understand my pain are in certain breakaway sects in Utah.

Ginger: And even those sects have trouble coming up with .8 of a spouse.

billytea: Nah. "I'd like you to meet the little woman."

Allyson:

I promise, when Bush wins, the world will keep turning. I work for NASA, and I know this to be true. We have lots of data to back us up.

aurelia:

We're gonna need a bigger handbasket.

y'all are eloquent in your pain:

Holli: My porn-and-frosting cure is not working, dammit.

This country really shouldn't have problems too big for rainbow chip frosting to fix.

Anne W.: I think I'm going to allow myself to feel bewildered and hopeless until, say, Thanksgiving. After that, righteous anger and a driving sense of purpose.

Nilly: Life is stronger than anything. Nilly "Natter 29: Got Title?" Nov 3, 2004 2:10:10 am PST

Matt the Bruins fan:

What gets me is that I don't feel robbed by this - it's not some shadowy conspiracy of Republican thugs sneaking around and fixing the elections (well, except maybe in Florida). It's that previously unsuspected millions of my fellow Americans popped up to say that they think the most incompetent, short-sighted, willfully manipulative and divisive President of my lifetime is doing a peachy job destroying everything that made this country great and they want 4 more years of the same.

It's not pleasant to wake up and realize that your best bet to see positive change from your government is for the Rapture to occur within the next few years.

Consuela:

I have to admit, it's amazing to me that this Democratic party, which is so middle-of-the-road as to be toothless, is considered such a threat by the conservatives in the middle of the country. Kerry won't come out for gay marriage, hasn't proposed anything close to universal health care, and basically has taken stands to the right of Clinton, who wasn't exactly Eugene Debs either.

It's not Kerry the conservatives are afraid of: it's us. The wacko quasi-socialist gay-friendly porn-writing computer-using international-friendly hyperliterate folks on the coasts.

It amazes me that a 39-year-old single professional woman with a dog, a very small house, and too many books, is such a threat to so many people.

DavidS , in Natter:

Scenario: Tip O'Neill's hanging out at the gates of heaven, having a smoke. Satan walks by and says, "Tip, how'd you like to see the Red Sox win the World Series. I can pull a few strings."

Tip gives him the stinkeye. "...And?"

Satan, "Bush gets four more years."

"Awww, fuck that. Get out of here before I call St. Michael on ya."

"Hear me out. They come back from three down against the Yankees in the playoffs. Then they totally humiliate them."

"No w-....Hmmm. Three down you say?"