?" They made their whole blankets from nothing!

P Moon: Did I mention that I also bred the sheep and spun the yarn for mine? The hardest part was genetically engineering them to grow sparkly black wool with little shiny pink loops.

Steph L.: I love taking a drive on a Sunday afternoon, driving past a field full of black-sparkly-pink-looped sheep, all grazing and frolicking...

JessicaMoon: They've spread to Ohio already? Damn, they're quick!

Steph L.: Just like the killer bees...

JessicaMoon: Only much much cuter. And woolly.

Hecubus explains a Hong Kong fantasy movie plot:

HK fantasies have notoriously ridiculous plots that make even opera sound like a Pinter play. So as I was bringing her up to date on the storyline, I was thinking how much Fay would like it: "That's Jet Li, the Swordsman. He's from the same sect as Brigitte who plays Asia the Invincible. But Asia stole the scroll of power to give ultimate supernatural power. However he had to castrate himself to get the power, which is why they keep calling Asia "he" when Brigitte is playing...him. Anyway, that's Master Wu who was held and tortured by Asia for years so he's mad, and those are the hooks he was hanging from. That's the swordsman's sister and the barbarian girl who throws snakes. Here's the tricky part, even though Asia is technically Jet Li's uncle, Asia and Jet have fallen in love through assumed identities. She tricked him by having one of her courtesans sleep with him. No, not Joey Wang - though she is unbelievably beautiful and is in love with Asia. No, Joey is a girl. That one. Right, so the male lead has fallen in love with his evil castrated supernatural uncle played by a beautiful woman."

Trudy, your missing poster is Sean K.

Because I love the graceful way he takes it:

connie neil: So, Wolfram, a career synonym for lawyer is monkey pimp? It explains so much.

Wolfram: Now that's going on my next business card. If you'll excuse me, I have to go corrupt some stray monkeys now.

A little further down in the same conversation:

Jess PMoon: NO MORE FUCKING MONKEYS. And I mean that in every way possible.

Wolfram: Hey, a guy's gotta make a living. Sheesh.

Gus, my secret boyfriend, but not my favourite (yet):

And some of you language purists would probably take exception to my beginning a sentence with a coordinating conjunction. Nor should you pass over this egregious abuse of the language. For it is hideous. Yet I have done so. Or so it seems.

Nutty in Bitches:

Mmm, Browder. I don't imagine the man wears leather pants every damn day of his life, more's the pity. Although you wouldn't be able to hear him talk over the squeaking he made as he walked.

Allyson in F2F Planning, explaining LA weather:

Sometimes, it is really friggin hot, here, and you'll wish you could pull off your own skin to be even more naked.

Sometimes, it's so cold here, you might lose your mind and go Donner Party on your roommate instead of raiding the mini-bar.

Sometimes, it is alternately freezing ass cold, and hell's bowels hot, all on the same day.

Occasionally, it rains toads. Also, there are driveby shootings, so wear a bulletproof vest, as well. But make sure it's not flammable in case something explodes. And it should be waterproof, in case it mysteriously hails water balloons.

And then there are earthquakes, wildfires, and mudslides.

We have weather. But mostly, it's 72 degrees and sunny.

I miss Massachusetts.

JZ, ibid.:

every possible weather contingency, up to and including rains of fire, toads, and crackwhores (note to self: galoshes, galoshes, galoshes).

amych in Buffy (context be damned):

Yeah, right, who'd believe that? That's the kind of thing that only happens on the WB....