ita in Natter, showing off her maternal instincts:

Imagine the 18 month old who has to be in the room when his dad is teaching, and then goes over to kneel by him, arms crossed, mirroring his stance perfectly and pretending to watch over the class of green belts. Every now and again he takes a break to go hit the pad his mother holds for him, or to try and handle the fake knives. Even the big bad men were getting misty.

I want one just like that.

Madrigal, on how to confuse Jehovah's Witnesses until they leave:

I just did my overobsequious routine, it involved stuff like offering coffee, then immediately remarking that I was sorry I forgot they couldn't have coffee, no wait, that's the Mormons, why can't they have coffee? Is that in the Bible somewhere? Do you know that passage? What version of the Bible do you use? A Vulgate? King James? Is it direct translation? I think we have cookies, are you allergic to nuts? There aren't any nuts in them, but everyone has allergies. I'd invite you into the lobby but there's a lot of perfume here and some people are allergic to perfume and does your religion allow you to wear perfume? That could be even more damaging than coffee. It's really cold outside, so maybe I could give you a thermos of coffee that's just really really diluted, or maybe some tea that has a lot less caffeine, but herbs, and herbs are witchcraft, and I think you're against that, but wait, it's the Mormons who can't have coffee. Why is that? (At some point I hope this approach gets them to blacklist me.)

In Natter:

JZ: Interestingly, Kate has just stolen Emmett's socks, which action is apparently the first step in her plot for world domination.

Burrell: Reminds me of the underwear gnomes. Weren't they going to take over the world, one pair of underpants at a time? But as I recall, they hadn't really worked out Step 2 yet.

Cindy in Bitches:

We're Buffistas and when Giles took us out to the desert and did the Watcher Hokey Pokey and shook his cute little gourd and temporarily transferred his guardianship of us to our spirit guide, the spirit guide told us: Pedantry is your gift.

Theresa W. in Buffy (non-spoilery):

Truth be told, I'm totally convinced that James and Jesus were brothers. However, it is a little known fact that the Greek term "adelphos" can also refer to FRAT brothers. James, Jesus, Peter, Judas, etc. were all Alpha Omega brothers at Nazareth U. This is evidenced by a small inscription in the lower corner of the ossuary of James the Just. Loosely translated from the Aramaic, it means "Long Live Kegmeister Jimmy."

Damn, it's good to have Theresa back.

Madrigal Costello discussing LTRs in Natter 11:

[S]o far, close up attempts aren't working. The current obsession still appears clueless - right now the next step would be serenading him with Liz Phair songs in his office in a bikini and hip boots playing a lute, but he'd probably just think I was trying to get him to join a band.

Natter X:

flea: I just ate a chocolate chocolate chip muffin. AIFG.

Theodosia: Chocolate chips shouldn't really go into muffins. It's like mixing up the wrong food groups or something.

Cindy: This is truer than anything in the world. I love chocolate chips. I love muffins. They should never meet, because they do not become a taste sensation. Really, they're an abomination unto the loward. I read it in Leviticus.

Beth b: Timelies. While I prefer blueberry muffins - chocolate chip would do - I am hungry.

Madrigal: Huh. I just realized that it's been years since I've had an actual muffin - not since high school home ec. It's an odd feeling.

DX: However, I will stand in solidarity with flea in the chocolate chip muffin corner. Especially if there are some chocolate chocolate chip muffins there. Or blueberry. It's all good.

Nutty: Chocolate chip muffins suffere the burden of having to be hot, or else the chips re-harden and then you are eating a muffin with little chocolatey rocks in it. Which is no good. I'm not against them in principle, but in practice I don't find my needs being met!

shrift: If there are blueberry muffins, I'm there. And Rio can mock us in ASSCAPS for being whitey.

erikaj: I hate blueberry stuff. I just do. But it's not like a squick. Other people can eat blueberries in front of me.

brenda m: Blueberry muffins bore me. A place near my old office had wonderful cranberry muffins. But really, leaving aside bran or corn muffins, muffins are really just an excuse to eat cake for breakfast without admitting what you're doing.

Kind of like asking for an extra-extra dry martini because you don't have the guts to just ask for a big ol' glass of gin.

continued,

DX:

Hands shrift a blueberry muffin, snuggles in between her and flea.

Cake is good for you! Eggs, milk, wheat, nutrition!

Oh well. More for us then.

Gus: Being sworn off carbs, the natter about blueberry muffins (as close to manna as mankind has come) is making me weep. Also, with the pizza-weeping. Yes. I am weeping pizza. It's ugly. Sorry for the visual.

Sean: Still just brimming over with the shrift love. Even more so after...

i And holy jeebus, am I glad I rebuilt my box this morning at work.
That sounds porny. But it isn't, I swear...

shrift: Aww. It's like we're forming the Militant Blueberry Muffin Separatists Party here in the corner, complete with cryptic computer geek pseudo-porn.

Jesse in Natter:

All the -ma a person could need! Right here on this very thread!! COME'N'GETIT!!