Gus, funny no matter how much or little alcohol he has ingested. In Natter. And no, ya don't get no context.

American-me: "Who let the dogs out?" Educator-me: "Flee! There are dogs among us!" Somali-me: "Look! Lunch!" Irish-me:" "Bring on yer feckin' dags, man."

Damn, that was funny the first time, but now I'm doing it with accents ... it's even better.

"Flee! t insert Shakespearean rep theatre hand gesture There are dogs among us!"

That's my pops-in-law.

Heh. I love this thread, because it means the skippers and skimmers among us still get to enjoy the best of the Buffistae.

In Bitches -

Steph

I am totally humorless when not doped up, and would otherwise never sing while eating jell-o.

In Natter:

amych: Hell, in NC, not only are oral and anal sex illegal regardless of your orientation, so are sex between umarried people, the use of a hotel room for immoral purposes, and my all-time personal fave, "Using Profane or Indecent Language on Public Highways".

billytea: Y'know, I had to think about this for a moment. I found myself trying to envisage the number of ways you could orient yourself for oral sex before I got the point.*

*: Finally twigged I was on the wrong track when I caught myself thinking "Facing Mecca!"

Emily, because context is for wimps:

Oops. As I go looking for Hell, I find angels.

In the Bible, in the Bible! Anyway, I'll let you know what I find out.

Anne W.:

What gets lost in ultra-conservative sects is the notion that the heart of Christianity is that we can call God "Father." The hyper-reactionary types have turned this into a toxic relationship that relies on a "wait until Daddy gets home!" sort of fear to keep people in line. If, however (by my way of thinking), you do see God as a loving father, you live your life in a way that you think will be pleasing to that father. If we fuck up, we're sorry not because we fear punishment, but because we've hurt someone who is important to us.

Cindy, in Bureaucracy:

We take pleasure in answering thus prominently the communication below, expressing at the same time our great gratification that its faithful author is numbered among the friends of The Buffista Bureaucracy:

Dear Editor---

I am a poster of a certain age. Some of my little friends say Buffy the Vampire Slayer will be over on May 20, 2003. Papa says, "If you see it in Buffista Bureaucracy 2: Like Sartre, Only Longer it's so." Please tell me the truth,

If I always keep Buffy in my heart, will she never die?

Pinwiz O'Hanlon

Pinwiz, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Pinwiz, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours, man is a mere (not Mere) insect, an ant, in his intellect as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, Pinwiz, there is a Buffy Summers. She exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Buffy Summers! It would be as dreary as if there were no Pinwizzes. There would be no childlike faith then (not to mention Faith!), no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence. We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The external light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

Not believe in Buffy! You might as well not believe in fairies. You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the graveyards on Hallowe'en to catch Buffy, but even if you did not see Buffy, stake in hand, what would that prove? Nobody (well, in the U.S. of A., anyhow) sees (new) Buffy (after 5/22/03 8:00 pm Eastern, 7:00 pm central, and 8:00 pm, Pacific) but that is no sign that there is no Buffy the Vampire Slayer. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

You tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived could tear apart. Only faith, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Pinwiz, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Buffy! Thank God! she lives and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Pinwiz, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, she will continue to make glad the heart of Buffistahood. There was no ancient prophecy about a slayer and her friends. But there will be legends, now and forever.

Jesse, I was just on my way to tag that. I second that tagging!

In Bitches:

Deena:

I'm thinking my credo is taking a little battering right now because I hate my children.

Betsy:

I've got your coat. If the Baby Jesus had our children sometimes he, too, would contemplate calling the gypsies to take them away.