Steph L:

Okay. I am NOT a big girly-girl. Blood, guts, gore -- do not bother me. Puke, belches, farts -- not a problem.

But I just went to get a glass of milk, and while I was pouring it, a BIG NASTY ROACH -- bigger than my big toe -- came calmly strolling into the kitchen FROM MY BEDROOM!!!!!!!

Granted, it was moving pretty slow, like it was old or drunk or sleepy.

And I yelled an outraged "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!", which made it turn back for my bedroom (suspecting that he was about to be dispatched to Roach Valhalla). I had no shoes or socks on, so I ran for a pair of shoes and a roll of paper towels.

I smooshed him as he tried to hide behind my clothes hamper.

But he came OUT OF MY BEDROOM!!!!!

BIGGER THAN MY BIG TOE!!!!!

A. ROACH.

How long was in in there?? Did he and his roach buddies walk all over me while I slept?

I am so grossed out I actually feel nauseated.

I don't want to sleep in my bedroom.

From Firefly (no spoilers - and yes, almost a month ago)

Allyson:

I can't figure out why some folks think Joss is supposed to be their own personal lord and saviour, and tell them what to do, how to think, when to take a leak. He's a writer. Sheesh.

Betsy Hanes Perry:

Maybe that's why my bladder has hurt so much since December.

shrift:

So, Allyson, what you're saying is that there's currently a huge, untapped market for an item that works as the Voice of Joss? Like a Magic 8 Ball?

Magic Joss Balls!

Rabid Fan: "Dear Joss, Should we continue to send apples and blue gloves to FBC, as well as trolling Fastlane and Joe Millionaire boards and pestering the everlovingshit out of the people who used to be leading the campaign?!?!"

Magic Joss Ball: "Reply hazy, try again."

flea:

Okay, Magic Joss Balls is killing me. In a porny 12 year old way.

laurmb:

Um, well, I'm ignoring the obvious visual there. Beyond that, just wondering what else a Magic Joss Ball would say. Grr?

TonyG:

"Ask ME later?"

"Yes. And by that I mean No."

ita:

"Go to your bunk!"

I believe 'insent' started as a play on 'incoming', only from the other direction.

Steph L on dusting:

Take rag. Swipe across surface of furniture. Repeat as necessary. You can even buy Pledge Wipes now, that are pre-treated and pick up dust just by, apparently, bringing the box of wipes in your apartment.

Cindy in Natter:

Oh, funny story. My m-i-l's birthday is coming up. My kids made cards for her yesterday (on their own). She is going to be 69. On my oldest son's (age 7) card he drew a picture of her wearing a shirt with a big "69" on it, and a cape, like she was a 69 superhero. It was decorated with several 69s all over it.

My husband and I are 12 years old, and unfit to be parents, because we all but pissed ourselves while choking back laughter.

ita acknowledges she might be just a wee bit crazy...

Good morning. I've been spending the morning so far determining how much I hurt. Epsom, arnica and neosporin have been applied. Apart from the sternum bruising (hammer of gun repeatedly driven into cleavage), I have no clear idea where I got all this from. I have an hour to work out if I can kickbox.

Dinner! Yesterday! I met Perkins and Laura and Laura's DH. I still think walking a marathon is insane (it'll help my point if you forget my first paragraph right now)

Betsy comments on parents who made their kid wait 45 minutes with a broken arm before they took him for medical care because "it was his fault".

Sick kids get first priority, period. And injured kids doubly so. I don't care if he was dancing naked on the roof shouting "Saddam come get me!"

Wildlife wackiness:

Perkins: but do evil giraffes make sounds? Billytea may need to correct me on this, but giraffes don't make sounds, IIRC.

scrappy: Giraffes say "Look at my lovely long neck and my beautiful eyelashes. I want you to come pet me and I will nuzzle you softly and be your friend forever." At least that's what they say to me.

Oh, not OUT LOUD, that would make the rest of you feel left out.

Jess PMoon: Evil giraffes narrow their eyes evilly and say "I'm going to eat more leaves than I should."

Betsy Hanes Perry: I took a Lush bath in my tiara last night.

David S: I would be sad that there's no photographic evidence of this, but the mental image is pretty clear. (With modesty preserving bubbles.)

Betsy Hanes Perry: Screw modesty. There was glitter. There was yonks of glitter. Not a bubble in sight.

I think you should include my enthusiastic "Okay!" to Betsy's immodesty.