I wanna die in bed surrounded by fat grandchildren, but guess that's off the menu.

Jenny ,'Bring On The Night'


Coffee On My Monitor  

This thread is for Buffista quotage. Posts that are profound, witty, or otherwise deserving of immortality go here. This is also Shrift's source for the BRQG, so be aware that if your words end up here, they'll also end up there. Finally, please note which thread spawned the quotage and please white-out anything that might be spoilery to Un-Americans.


jengod - Jan 06, 2003 7:12:35 pm PST #1729 of 10000

Typo Boy in Literary: "Hey, stick with me kid, and you'll always be on the fringe."


Java cat - Jan 06, 2003 8:21:44 pm PST #1730 of 10000
Not javachik

Natter:

jengod: Birds are cool!

erikaj: yes. When I was 5, I wanted to be one. The school psych. had a problem with this "No," he said. "you can't." "Yes,I can," I was told I said "My mom says I can be whatever I want."


DavidS - Jan 06, 2003 8:44:47 pm PST #1731 of 10000
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

Gud, with minion in Sang Sacre:

"Isn't Cthulhu sort of...you know...evil?"

"You'd think that, but this pamplet is really pretty compelling. I'm thinking of maybe going to the bake sale."


Lysana - Jan 07, 2003 12:16:04 am PST #1732 of 10000
Hellbound Equal-Opportunity Nookie Hog

Billytea, in Natter:

One time in Toastmasters, I was explaining the timing arrangements for a speech. Went something like this: "At 4 minutes the speaker will receive a green light. At 5 minutes the amber light will go on, and at 6 minutes the red light will go on. ...At 6 and a half minutes, if he's still talking, I'll start looking at my watch and shaking it to see if it's stopped. At 7 minutes I'll attempt to start a Mexican Wave. And at 8 minutes we'll rush the podium, chloroform him and fit him with a radio transmitting collar so we can study his migratory habits."

People actually stayed within time that meeting. Except for one of the older members who's... oh, look at that. He's now in Perth, apparently. Huh.


Am-Chau Yarkona - Jan 07, 2003 3:38:19 am PST #1733 of 10000
I bop to Wittgenstein. -- Nutty

Hum. Dana (post #1720) already got part of this conversation, but I'm snerking enough I think it should all go in.

It's long, and I hope I've picked out all the right parts and attributed them correctly. There are many non-sequiters, as often found in the Ancient Writings of the Buffista.

Nutty:

I'd sort of suggest that anybody who wants to wear his own One Ring didn't pay attention to the plot of the book. Sort of like, if you were playing Dracula and wore a silver cross around your neck. The ring isn't something to admire, and there's just about no point in the books where it's, you know, cool.

I don't have a problem, e.g., with the wearing of elf-ears and/or all manner of weaponry (although security might).

It's shmucky not because it's fannish, but because it completely misses the point of the book.

Tom Scola:

Now I'm imagining Middle Earth PSAs:

Hi, Frodo here. I'm here to tell you that owning the One Ring is not cool. Just Say No to the One Ring.

This is your brain. This is your brain after looking into the Palantir. Any questions?

Holli:

My friend Shira has a One Ring. A bunch of her friends, myself included, have agreed to accompany her to Mordor should it become necessary. Though we do not know the way.

Cindy:

When you're leaving Rivendell, turn left.

Jess PMoon:

At the post-ring-destroying press conference...

Q: So Frodo, how did you find Mordor?

Frodo: Turn left at Rivendell.

Aimée:

Frodo and Sam pop out of a hole in the ground and consult a map whilst chewing on carrots. Sam points and says, "I knew we should have turned left at Rivendell, doc."

Okay, bad joke. Come back. I'll stop.

Cindy:

I just couldn't think of a snappy comeback, befitting the image.

Aimée:

I've also screwed myself because now I'm doing Lord of the Rings with WB characters in my head.

Frodo gets an anvil dropped on his head. The Nazgul leaving a pile of Hobbit Feed on the road.....

Pete Jackson at the end of RotK popping through the screen..

"buh-dee, buh-dee, buh-dee, That's all folks!"

Billytea:

The image of Frodo hooning up behind them and shouting "beep beep!" is going to be a serious impediment to my productivity today, I can tell.

Aimée:

It's the image of the Nazgul shooting straight up into the sky that is making me snort-laugh.

Betsy Hanes Perry:

Son--- ah say, Son-- bit of an empty hood here, don't you think -- you shall not pass!

Aimée:

Chicken Hawk is Saurman.

Holli:

Now I'm envisioning a whole troop of Uruk-Hai trundling off the edge of a cliff, all unawares, not noticing the abscence of ground beneath them until one unfotunate looks down and the whole bunch plummets, landing in a little puff of dust far, far below.

Billytea:

Y'know, now I think about it, the Nazgul do have that endearingly indestructible tenor of a WB baddie. I believe that if you look carefully in TTT, you'll notice that their winged mounts have "ACME" stamped on the side.

Anne W.:

"W-welcome to Ri-Rivendell, Mister B-b-b-Frodo."


DXMachina - Jan 07, 2003 7:56:18 am PST #1734 of 10000
You always do this. We get tipsy, and you take advantage of my love of the scientific method.

Previously in COMM (back on WX, [link] ):

Miracleman:

Okay, you know how you get a song stuck in your head?

Ever get two?

Ever get two wildly disparate songs?

Currently my mental soundtrack consists of Lord of The Rings and Merry Go Round Brokedown.

Which just gives me this weird mental image of Daffy Duck as Gollum, going "My preccccioussss...my preccccioouussss...I'm rich! I'm filthy rich! I'm comfortably well off! We're in the dark lands...we're in the dark lands..."

DavidS:

Wouldn't that be more like..."My prethhouss, My prethhouss..."?

Madrigal Costello:

Well, now I've got a scene of, "It's elf season!" "No, it's hobbit season!" "No, elf season!" in my head.

DXMachina:

"Be vewwy, vewwy qwiet. I'm hunting hobbits."

DavidS:

"Kill de Hobbit! Kill de Hobbit! What hab I done? I've killed de Hobbit..."

Miracleman:

Would that make Yosemite Sam Saruman? "You dang-blasted varmint of a wizard. I'll shoot you full of lead..."

Fred Pete:

"Of course, you realize this means war for the Ring."

DXMachina:

"Hey, this isn't Minas Tirith. I knew I shoulda taken that left turn at Lothlorien..."

Nutty:

Okay, I was working on some all serious thoughts about the Constitution and amendments and the course of true bureaucracy, not to mention my experiences with federal paranoia, but now we are being all a-slapstick.

So... who does Foghorn Leghorn turn out to be? How about Pep le Pew?

DavidS:

"I say, I say, Listen here boy...You shall not pass! Nice Balrog but a little dim in the attic if you know what I mean."

billytea:

Sauron: "Where's the kaboom? There's supposed to be an earth-shattering kaboom!"


Cindy - Jan 07, 2003 8:00:58 am PST #1735 of 10000
Nobody

Am now sure MM is whispering into Aimee's ear whilst she sleeps. Sorta like the cockroach in Bloom County.


Am-Chau Yarkona - Jan 07, 2003 8:03:56 am PST #1736 of 10000
I bop to Wittgenstein. -- Nutty

Fact of life #3472312: Buffistas, they brain-share.


Cindy - Jan 07, 2003 8:13:21 am PST #1737 of 10000
Nobody

Pretty sure MM and Aimee share more than a brain.


Am-Chau Yarkona - Jan 07, 2003 8:33:39 am PST #1738 of 10000
I bop to Wittgenstein. -- Nutty

Fact of life #3472313: Don't ask too much about what the Buffistas share. For you are as slashable as them.