John H., clarifying The Two Towers;

in case you're confused:

• There's just one Gollum. Really.
• Faramir and Boromir, despite being brothers, were separated at birth, and went to live in Yorkshireador and Australiador, so that's why they talk so differently.
• The guy on the winged lamprey of doom isn't that smart. He's all "well, hobbit with a ring, yeah, but what are the chances that was the Hobbit with the ring? I won't mention it to Sauron".
• Aragorn only kissed his horse because he thought it was Arwen. Honestly.

Hope this helps.

Oh, just COMM the whole damned post.

billytea "Natter 6: We're wearing the cheese RIGHT NOW!!" Jan 3, 2003 12:17:54 am EST

From Bureaucracy:

Trudy Booth: I'd imagine we could walk the line between "Henry Kissinger is a war criminal" and "YOU are a war criminal".

billytea Hmmm. If Henry Kissinger himself starts posting on these boards, that could leave us in a quandary.

billytea Hmmm. If Henry Kissinger himself starts posting on these boards, that could leave us in a quandary.

This is more amusing now than it was before...

ita: Am Chau, it's possible that you're new enough here that you don't understand.
My devotion to Legolas makes Sam look like a philanderer with intimacy issues.
Back the hell up off the elf, miss.

*************

Jess P Moon clarifying Spoiler Lite policy - (i.e. "Lessons" is fine to post in public, but "Tara's Ghost Teaches Dawn How To Drive" should be whited out.)

In Dude--

Nutty:

Do you remember reference to balrogs having wings? I remember their flamey whips from The Silmarillion, but for the life of me -- if they had wings, they were vestigial and like unto Buffalo wings, right?

Fay:

Well, clearly the wings were no damned good, because as methods of transport go, they served Mr. Rog not at all. No sir. Smash the bridge out from under him and he's all "Doh!" and tumbletumbletumble, whereas any half decent pair of wings would have had him all flapflapflap Ha Ha, you buggers!

Shawn :

I keep getting caught up in PBS animal shows late Saturday nights and realizing my mistake too late-- always 20 or 30 minutes in they anthropomorphize this animal and then through clever editing suggest that it GOT KILLED by some vicious beast they then proceed to make me sympathetic toward. It's too much, man.

Hmm. Smells like Minear.

Context? Pshaw. Plei in Precious - what more do you need?

Okay, the Haldir Lives thong? Wrong on so many levels I stopped counting.

edited to add - ita, unrelated but also in Precious

I just got the geek crown back.

When asked to explain potential scenarios for infected haematomas without broken skin, I likened the bacteria that live deep in muscle as the Balrog, and my getting bruised as the dwarves mining too deeply.

I didn't mean to! It was the pain, and perhaps a fever!

Noumenon, in Bureaucracy:

the White Font Thread would be totally easy to catch up in.

Michele T., in PPO:

t orchestral music begins

[We focus in on SHRIFT, sitting, bent over with toil, at a computer desk. She has a hat on her head and a look of unspeakable sorrow in her heart.]

[The computer dings]

SHRIFT (blearily): Wha --- ?

COMPUTER (tinnily): You have HoYay!

[Come in closer to SHRIFT, clicking on her screen. Slowly she begins to smile. The orchestral music grows louder and triumphant.]

SHRIFT: HoYay!

[SHRIFT jumps out of her chair, pulls off her hat, and throws it in to the air. As the music turns into a celebratory waltz, she dances around the room, spinning and laughing.]

[FADE OUT]

Ah. The magic of the movies.