Ms. Havisham: "So the most difficult present to wrap this year is my mom's body
pillow."

Dana: I gotta say, the line break there really gave me pause.

The recasting of TTT in Dude Where's my Precious: PMM:

Beastie Boys as all the Not!Frodo Hobbits.

Hec:

Yo, Mike Gamgee is rocking the house

Wit Pippin and Merry as small as a mouse

Don't fuck wit us 'cuz we got no fear

If you don't like it you can suck my palantir!

Connie Neil, Dude Where's My Precious, with a surprisingly insightful quip:

I think Mrs. Denethor went to her reward a long time ago. Being a mom in a fantasy world is a dangerous business.

In TTT:

askye: So who plays Legolas in your Worst Lord of the Rings Ever special?

ita: Carrot Top.

So does the sentence "she literally fucked me" mean ANYTHING any more?

ita in natter.

Nutty, in Firefly:

(Also, how else could we get notions like Star Trek Voyager: Blake's Seven on Valium! Farscape: Blake's Seven on acid! Firefly: Blake's Seven on -- well, I don't know; I've never actually seen Blake's Seven.)

Shawn:

A community dedicated to discussions of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, Angel, Firefly, and twice monthly wars between descriptivists and prescriptivists.

In LotR - Dude! Where's My Precious? Context? Gah - sap and slash and the Buffistas tendencies thereof led to tree puns.

FayJay

Why yes, I am a complete fucking sap.

Oh - at other times, it's just sex. With the slash-impulse, I mean. 'Cause Angel/Lindsey - not so much with the love, but the UST? Boy howdy. Yes.)

connie neil

But only with consenting trees, I imagine.

FayJay

Really, their bark is worse than my bite.

connie neil

To which my first thought was "Ow!"

FayJay

You've got some deep rooted prejudices there, Connie. You want to branch out.

connie neil

Look, Fay, I'm so desperately trying to keep my mind out of the "beard ... Treebeard ... why does a tree need a beard?" loop that I'm having trouble twigging to new thoughts.

FayJay

Ah. I understand. Perhaps you should turn over a new leaf?

connie neil

I think I shall concede, Fay. Take a bough.

FayJay

Oh, you woodn't want me to do that, I'm sure.

connie neil

We're trying to keep the timber of this conversation high, you know.

ita

Neither of you are doing anything to make yourselves poplar around here.

I wonder which one of you will be the one that leaves first?

FayJay

ita, don't be such a beech.

connie neil

I hear Fay likes a good birching ...

FayJay

oakay, there may be some truth to that.

ita

Elm going to have to take a pass on the beatings, myself.

connie neil

I know you're pining for it, Fay.

FayJay

Fair enough, but do stick around.

connie neil (ouch /editorial)

But it's not as if I'm insinuating you do it alder time.

FayJay

Pining for it? Fir heaven's sakes! Let me just spruce myself up here.

Holly mother of God, Connie, what a suggestion!

connie neil

I wouldn't want to embarass you. You wouldn't want to turn red,wood you?

FayJay

You're just trying to needle me.

connie neil

Fay, you are the apple of my eye, you peach, you.

FayJay

See, Connie, now you're just being acorny. I'm not going to Fall for such shameless flattery.

connie neil

I'll Spring back. But it's time for my lunch/dinner break. I'm heartbroken that I must leaf.

FayJay

The world will be a plank and desolate place 'til you return.

--------------------------

Also - Griffyn in LotR during the LotR Anti!Casting contest. I like to think of this as A Buffista Spirit Baby Gets His Wings...

Just an OT statement in general...

You people are sick, disgusting and perverted!

No wonder I like it here so much. :D

Trudy, soliciting gift ideas from the ever-helpful Buffistas in Natter:

My Father's wife likes Vodka, Bridge and Golf. What the hell should I get her?

billytea:

Omar Sharif.

ita:

A serial comma.

His hatred of Dawn was just so pure and righteous and enduring - it was one of those true solid things so rare these days.