It was eventually banned at school

They always ban the really fun ones.

Zoe, I'm foxed as to why you'd want to try translating your normal speech before posting things here. It sounds like it's causing you some moderate annoyance/confusion/irritation, but let me implore you not to put yourself through the hassle. It's needless, I swear. I mean, however far your spoken English may differ from RP, I'm sure you don't customarily write in wholly impenetrable broad Scots. (And I don't think you're a native Gaelic speaker, are you? Although the only Gaelic speakers I've known have all been wholly bilingual and said they didn't know anyone who wasn't fluent in English, so I'm assuming that's not the issue.) Although, you know, I reckon most of us would be able to fathom most of what you wrote even if you customarily wrote like Rabbie Burns, just so long as you stuck to it and gave us a chance to get the hang of it.

Actually, I know I'm quite often thrown by what you write - and if it's because you're going through some sort of haphazard translation process, that might explain it. (fwiw, I've lived in Scotland and studied in Scotland, and lived with Scots in London. My degree even covered a little Scots literature and a fair bit of Scottish History etc etc, although heaven knows I'm ignorant enough still. I don't think you need to translate your normal speech patterns for me.)

My point being, though, that provided you construct your sentences and arguments with reasonable clarity, the people here aren't going to be baffled by colloquial turns of phrase or unfamiliar words - there are, after all, plenty of dialects of English across the US, many of which are represented here. (And then there are the English, Scots, Australian, Spanish and Israeli posters, etc.) If you do use a word which is unfamiliar, or if it's something that has a different connotation (or even denotation) across the pond, they'll ask. And they'll be really chuffed to meet a new word or turn of phrase. Provided your language is consistent, then people will have the chance to take on board any dramatic ways in which it differs from their own - just as you do get used to someone's accent in everyday speech.

Fay, may I lick you?

Prisonball was the variant of dodgeball we usually played. But the switching-sides-instead-of-going-to-prison kind is still the best.

t looks fierce

Fay, may I lick you?

t looks fiercer

[paranoid edit: that was, of course, a joke-- I know I don't have any real claim to FayJay!]

meep!

Two of my favourite laydeez. And licking. Cool.

preens.

Just popping in to let out a howl of unAmerican wrath, though. Caught the first half of tonight's Buffy ( "Conversations with Dead People") and it was soooo good (no, no, I'm not going to be Spoiler!Gal, and I dare say it wasn't everyone's cup of tea, but I was really enjoying it tremendously) and then I had to drag myself away because I still. haven't. finished. my. bloody. essay.

I am, in fact, half way through. Unrevised. Um.

Deadline: 9.15am tomorrow. Time now: 11pm.

Rassenfrassensassen grrrr.

And I haven't even seen any of Angel.

Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

ION, Yay! for the whole "Hmmm, perhaps this emphasis upon test results may be detrimental to Primary Teaching" comments from the God of Ofsted. Yay Yay Yay! Because of course it is.

CwDP was an amazing, amazing ep.

(I have mp3s of the music from it. As do a few other people. Btw. If you're interested, pretty lady.)

And tonight's episode of Angel (Spin the Bottle) is the dog's bollocks.

Is that like "The Cat's Meow"? Or, is it a bad thing?

Oh fuck. It's Spin the Bottle? Man, I've heard all about that one. Bugger bugger bugger BUGGER.

prays that the Video Gods don't let her down.

"The Dog's Bollocks" (aka "The Mutt's Nuts") was a popular phrase in the late 90s. Not quite as popular now, but still in use. Means "Damn Fine" - like, indeed, "The Cat's Meow."

It's derivation? Heaven only knows. Although dogs are clearly very fond of their bollocks. But still.