Cindy, K-Bug was a mother's helper for a neighbor a couple of summers ago. The family had adopted 5 kids and she liked having K-Bug over even if it was to just watch some of the kids while she bathed the others. I can't imagine going from zero to five kids and being able to balance all the parental stuff.

she always wonders about it, when she has a kid who has never cried at least once or twice, about being left at school, by a parent.

Unsurprisingly, that would be me. I think I shooed my parents away on my first day of Montessori.

Ok. Giving up on Target.com for now.

Someone make me go do dishes.

Go do dishes vw!

*cracks whip*

ita, had you been home with a parent for all the years prior to Montessori?

Aaawww. Em loves Aimee. Unsurprising, that. Going to preschool is teaching her how to deal with separation anxiety, but don't forget that you're also teaching her that you'll always come back for her.

I also wish that I could spend the day taking naps and having somebody bring me French Toast, preferably with sides o'maple syrup and homemade strawberry jam. Maybe some whipped cream, too. Ooh! And bacon, and orange juice, and and and and... Hm. Better ask for a pony while I'm at it.

had you been home with a parent for all the years prior to Montessori?

I'm trying to remember--there might have been a couple months of daycare in NY before I went to Montessori in Ottawa. But I was notorious for impatiently waiting for my parents to leave, or for abandoning them entirely.

Julia is not unlike that. She did have a fairly short period of crying at pre-school first, though. I started her during Ben's summer before kindergarten, and sent him that summer, so that she'd have him there as a cushion. She was thrilled to be doing what her big brother did. It was way better than being stuck at home with me and the baby. She couldn't have cared less that I left, at first.

A week or two in, she started crying. Then she was fine, and I could barely get a kiss goodbye. She may have had a little bump when Ben left, but not much. About six months later (I think) she started with the crying again, but it was only for a brief span, and her teacher said she'd stop as soon as my car was out of sight.

I was just an anti-social attachment-averse chick. I'm so much better now.

Thanks, David. I can always count on you to bring the reassurance.

It doesn't mean Em is unhappy there. It just means she'd rather be with you and is expressing that in the only way she can.

You know what helps? Having a going-away ritual. At Emmett's pre-school (where he did stop crying at separation) they had a Dutch door where you could say good-bye to your child. You'd leave them inside and tell them to go to the Dutch door, and they'd run around to the back yard and you could say good-bye to them but (a) they couldn't cling to you; and (b) they were surrounded by lots of distracting toys.

The going-away ritual is best when it isn't "Mommy's going bye-bye now" but rather something like you walk Em over to an activity table and start a drawing or stack of blocks or something and reassure her that you're coming back later. Something like that. Eventually the process of going to the table will become reassuring and if you're consistent your child won't try to play the situation because it's just inevitable.