Mal: Okay. She won't be winning any beauty contests anytime soon. But she is solid. Ship like this, be with ya 'til the day you die. Zoe: 'Cause it's a deathtrap.

'Out Of Gas'


Spike's Bitches 31: We're Motivated Go-getters.  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


DavidS - Aug 18, 2006 7:50:39 am PDT #9261 of 10001
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

Thanks, David. I can always count on you to bring the reassurance.

It doesn't mean Em is unhappy there. It just means she'd rather be with you and is expressing that in the only way she can.

You know what helps? Having a going-away ritual. At Emmett's pre-school (where he did stop crying at separation) they had a Dutch door where you could say good-bye to your child. You'd leave them inside and tell them to go to the Dutch door, and they'd run around to the back yard and you could say good-bye to them but (a) they couldn't cling to you; and (b) they were surrounded by lots of distracting toys.

The going-away ritual is best when it isn't "Mommy's going bye-bye now" but rather something like you walk Em over to an activity table and start a drawing or stack of blocks or something and reassure her that you're coming back later. Something like that. Eventually the process of going to the table will become reassuring and if you're consistent your child won't try to play the situation because it's just inevitable.


juliana - Aug 18, 2006 7:51:32 am PDT #9262 of 10001
I’d be lying if I didn’t say that I miss them all tonight…

I have nothing to add on the daycare front - I just remember that the nursery school people had a hell of a time getting me to nap.

Sanity check - should I buy these Docs? I need new shoes for my second job and I was saying I'd get a pair of 20-eyelets if I ever get a real bartending gig, so I'm thinking maybe just bite the bullet & get them?


SuziQ - Aug 18, 2006 7:52:23 am PDT #9263 of 10001
Back tattoos of the mother is that you are absolutely right - Ame

Ya know what is fun? On a day when your body hates you? A fire drill in a full evacuation building. And being floor warden to boot.

I just had the pleasure of kicking everyone out of their office and then hussling down 8 floors to stand around in the cold until they let us go back to work.

Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!


SuziQ - Aug 18, 2006 8:05:50 am PDT #9264 of 10001
Back tattoos of the mother is that you are absolutely right - Ame

Only 38% done with the work that has to happen today.


Topic!Cindy - Aug 18, 2006 8:09:45 am PDT #9265 of 10001
What is even happening?

I was just an anti-social attachment-averse chick. I'm so much better now.

Julia's extra-social, which is why she usually took the, "Yeah goodbye or whatever, I'm busy," point of view.

The going-away ritual is best when it isn't "Mommy's going bye-bye now" but rather something like you walk Em over to an activity table and start a drawing or stack of blocks or something and reassure her that you're coming back later. Something like that. Eventually the process of going to the table will become reassuring and if you're consistent your child won't try to play the situation because it's just inevitable.

I'd like to offer an opposite experience. I found my children interpreted my lingering (even if it was just to talk to the teacher, who was a personal friend) as apprehension (on my part) over leaving them, and it seemed to increase their anxiety.

When they were going through their crying-at-my-departure phases, I found they did better if I left obviously (I hate when parents sneak out on a kid, it seems like dirty pool to me), but fairly quickly and cheerfully. Personally, I think I'd only get into developing a ritual if the separation anxiety continued for a while longer.


DavidS - Aug 18, 2006 8:13:27 am PDT #9266 of 10001
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

I'd like to offer an opposite experience. I found my children interpreted my lingering (even if it was just to talk to the teacher, who was a personal friend) as apprehension (on my part) over leaving them, and it seemed to increase their anxiety.

I don't advocate lingering either. The going away ritual doesn't have to be protracted. When I dropped Emmett off at pre-school it was get in the door, put his lunch in the cubby and head to the Dutch door goodbye.


Aims - Aug 18, 2006 8:14:17 am PDT #9267 of 10001
Shit's all sorts of different now.

The going-away ritual is best when it isn't "Mommy's going bye-bye now" but rather something like you walk Em over to an activity table and start a drawing or stack of blocks or something and reassure her that you're coming back later. Something like that. Eventually the process of going to the table will become reassuring and if you're consistent your child won't try to play the situation because it's just inevitable.

This would be awesome, but the teacher gets her from the front door and takes her back.


Topic!Cindy - Aug 18, 2006 8:19:02 am PDT #9268 of 10001
What is even happening?

I didn't even stay that long when they were in their crying phase, Hec. I walked them in the door, kissed them, then said goodbye before they took off their coats. On days I failed to do that, the teacher said the crying lasted longer.


DavidS - Aug 18, 2006 8:20:40 am PDT #9269 of 10001
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

Well, I do concur that hanging around makes the separation worse.


vw bug - Aug 18, 2006 8:21:19 am PDT #9270 of 10001
Mostly lurking...

Can anyone go to half.com and see if they can find a contact e-mail address to half.com? I'm about to strangle them. I've gotten 15 notification e-mails today about ONE sale. And, I can't find any way to contact them.