I 'd apologizes to the landlord, and say you were pushed by a family member.

and your uncle is starting from the wrong place. tenent moves out on day a - and there are 10 days between day a and dayb when new tenet is to move it. That is his time to do any repairs or cleaning that might be needed. his letting you come in early is shortening his repair time, not doubling rent. now, he could be doing something wrong, but I think it is a bad place to be - assuming someone is doing wrong

All right, how's this?

[Kooky old French guy], I apologize. Personally, I was perfectly happy to pay pro-rated rent in order to move in early.

My uncle, however, has a very cynical worldview when it comes to landlords and mechanics and car salesmen and almost anyone. He immediately assumed that you were attempting to collect double rent. I told him that was ridiculous because from all I had gathered about you, I believed you to be a very upstanding man who would never try to cheat his tenants. He suggested I ask anyway because if the tenant had paid through the month, I shouldn't have to pay.

I asked, and you explained that it would be illegal, and I, again, was content with your answer, but my uncle, again, didn't believe it. He said that most landlords would let you in early free if you asked; it wasn't as if they could do anything with the unit during that extra time anyway. He said I should make another request, citing budgetary expenses. Negotiate, he said, and you can save some money.

I was very uncomfortable doing it, but I followed his instructions because I am supposed to respect his advice as a family member. I feel like I have ended up offending you, and for that, I am very sorry.

As I said, I am fine honoring the agreement we came to before I let my uncle become involved. I will pay the pro-rated rent. I wanted to explain myself, however, because I am rather ashamed with my behavior and did not want you to think that I was the sort of person who tries to take advantage of people. I hope we can continue on as pleasantly as we had been before. Thank you.

P-C, [Kooky old French guy] doesn't know your uncle, correct? If he does, I'd suggest combining paragraphs 2 and 3 to something a little more summary.

P-C, [Kooky old French guy] doesn't know your uncle, correct?

Oh, not at all. Although I suppose he will meet him when I move in. Heh.

P-C, I would make a few changes, like so:

[Kooky old French guy], I need to apologize. Personally, I was perfectly happy to pay pro-rated rent in order to move in early.

My uncle, however, has a very cynical worldview, [snip] and immediately assumed that a landlord would attempt to collect double rent if he could get away with it. I don't share my uncle's worldview, and I disagree with him totally. I told him that [snip] you are a very upstanding man who treats his tenants fairly. He suggested I ask anyway because his opinion is that if the tenant had paid through the month, I shouldn't have to pay.

I asked, and you explained that it would be illegal, and I, again, was content with your answer, but my uncle, again, didn't believe it. He believes that most landlords would let you in early free if you asked and that it wasn't as if they could do anything with the unit during that extra time anyway. He urged me to make another request, citing budgetary expenses. Negotiate, he said, and you can save some money.

I was very uncomfortable doing it, but I followed his instructions because I try to respect his advice as a family member. I realize that by following his advice, I proposed a scenario that was unfair to you, and I offended you, and for that, I am very sorry.

As I said, I am fine honoring the agreement we came to before I let my uncle become involved. I will pay the pro-rated rent. I wanted to explain myself, however, because I am rather ashamed with my behavior and did not want you to think that I was the sort of person who tries to take advantage of people. I hope we can continue on as pleasantly as we had been before. Thank you.

Our editrix La Tep La Ramone is wise. I like those edits quite a bit.

See, I knew you could make it better! Thanks, Tep.

I would go with Teppy's version and stop taking advice from your uncle.

P-C, I kept making a few more fiddly changes -- make sure you've read the most recent edit.

I'm afraid I offended him and pissed him off by asking him

You sure did. Way to go Bad Advice Uncle!

Sunil, my friends Ivor and Lars are identical twins, but they had two completely different ways of dealing with their high powered bossy parents. Ivor would nod agreeably and tell his parents what they wanted to hear while vaguing it up. This let them feel like they were appropriately in control whilst affording Ivor a maximum of freedom and a minimum of stress. Lars, however, would engage his parents head-to-head, flail, get steamrollered and then be resentful and upset.

Your lack of guile makes you the number one buttmonkey in your family because they're all bossy as hell. You are direct and honest and you'll continue to be punished for this as long as you interact with them. Sorry about that, but it's true.

Also you're terrible at reading your family dynamics and whenever you try to do the right thing, you mess up because it's all based on appearances instead of actual right behavior (which is not how you think).

Your strategies at this point are (a) stop interacting with them (not likely); (b) get stronger and bossier than they are (probably not likely); (c) dissemble (go dissembling!); (d) get some therapy and learn important lessons about disengaging from people, and knowing what's Your Shit and what's Their Shit and how to enforce those boundaries (healthiest approach, but it takes a couple years).

In short, you need to master Emotional Jiu-Jitsu, where you turn aside the frontal attacks of more powerful people. You're not in their weight class, as it were, and you need to use their power against them. Step aside. Deflect. Let them draw inferences from your vague disclaimers that satisfy their own worldview.

When you go head-to-head with your Mom or your Uncle you're going to get pummeled.