See, I knew you could make it better! Thanks, Tep.

I would go with Teppy's version and stop taking advice from your uncle.

P-C, I kept making a few more fiddly changes -- make sure you've read the most recent edit.

I'm afraid I offended him and pissed him off by asking him

You sure did. Way to go Bad Advice Uncle!

Sunil, my friends Ivor and Lars are identical twins, but they had two completely different ways of dealing with their high powered bossy parents. Ivor would nod agreeably and tell his parents what they wanted to hear while vaguing it up. This let them feel like they were appropriately in control whilst affording Ivor a maximum of freedom and a minimum of stress. Lars, however, would engage his parents head-to-head, flail, get steamrollered and then be resentful and upset.

Your lack of guile makes you the number one buttmonkey in your family because they're all bossy as hell. You are direct and honest and you'll continue to be punished for this as long as you interact with them. Sorry about that, but it's true.

Also you're terrible at reading your family dynamics and whenever you try to do the right thing, you mess up because it's all based on appearances instead of actual right behavior (which is not how you think).

Your strategies at this point are (a) stop interacting with them (not likely); (b) get stronger and bossier than they are (probably not likely); (c) dissemble (go dissembling!); (d) get some therapy and learn important lessons about disengaging from people, and knowing what's Your Shit and what's Their Shit and how to enforce those boundaries (healthiest approach, but it takes a couple years).

In short, you need to master Emotional Jiu-Jitsu, where you turn aside the frontal attacks of more powerful people. You're not in their weight class, as it were, and you need to use their power against them. Step aside. Deflect. Let them draw inferences from your vague disclaimers that satisfy their own worldview.

When you go head-to-head with your Mom or your Uncle you're going to get pummeled.

P-C, Teppy's done an excellent edit job. Go with it.

Yeah, I saw that you fiddled a bit. Thanks.

I would go with Teppy's version and stop taking advice from your uncle.

Heh. His latest advice is to buy a laptop instead of buying a new desktop and/or new monitor. "That's what I would do."

I was very uncomfortable doing it, but I followed his instructions because I am supposed to respect his advice as a family member.

Something still bothers me about this sentence (and we now know who of Steph and I edits for a living, but that's beside the point....). Why are you supposed to do what your uncle says? Is your culture geared toward that kind of deference? Does your family place importance on that point? Is his advice usually good?

The problem is, I'm not sure how to correct it without possibly making yourself look worse.

Teppy's done an excellent edit job.

I can, when need be, actually be diplomatic and bullshit people smooth ruffled feathers, instead of my surly cranky bitey self.

I just generally don't see the need.

However! Anything for P-C, yo.

The problem is, I'm not sure how to correct it without possibly making yourself look worse.

I changed it to say "....I try to respect his advice as a family member...."

Because that conveys the right tone of Not A Jackhole To His Family While Still Thinking Independently But Once In A While Takes Shaky Advice.

IMO, that is.

Crap, P-C! Don't be all close-to-tears! Teppy's changes to the letter strike me as being Of The Good, and I think that the thing to focus on now is gaining and maintaining the good relationship with the landlord. And getting the hell away from Uncle BadAdvice-Cow.

Meanwhile, I ply you with virtual hugs and cookies and hot girls (who may be white or black or whatever, even though that never works out).

In mememe news, wheeeeeeeee! I now own this and can pretend to be a student at Durmstrang.

FanTAStic.

::scampers off to learn the Dark Arts and cast Imperio on Uncle BadAdvice-Cow::