{{{{P-C}}}}

~ma for Raq and Vortex.

super~ma for Beverly and StE and your whole family.

Happy b-day, Katerina B.

{{{{{{{{{{P-C}}}}}}}}}}

As part of your second family, I think I speak for all when I say you get no scraps at this table. Full plate, always.

t /damn allergies

Oh, P-C, you poor guy.

They didn't do anything wrong, though. It was all my own stupid fault.

Well, I think you've finally convinced me that your mother is right, P-C.

"And she should be Gujarati. Please don't pick a white or black or anything. They never work out...Their views aren't the same as our views. They rarely work out. Very low chances. Maybe one in a hundred."

Speaking as a non-Gujarati white chick, my views of how families should treat each other and deal with monetary issues and going out are definitely not the same as your family's views.

It was all my own stupid fault.

Next time you'll get the fried rice. All these tricky social codes to negotiate.

I disagree. They put you in an impossible position.

I don't really know that I understood how the ordering process worked at the restaurant, but I'm guessing it was a step up and order what you want kind of thing? If my family was out together, everyone would get a chance to order, and if someone wasn't ordering we'd badger them three ways to Sunday to make sure that maybe they'd want a little something, etc. It seems a little inconsiderate to not at least check to see if you wanted something, whether you're expected to pay for yourself or not.

But then again, I'm a white chick, so...

More {{{ }}}.

Please don't pick a white or black or anything. They never work out...

I am a bad person, because I keep thinking this ought to be someone's tag line.

They didn't do anything wrong, though. It was all my own stupid fault.

You know what, sweetie, I had a whole big thing on [what follows] before, but deleted it, because I thought maybe you needed empathy more than advice. This time, I offer it not as advice, but hope.

You are becoming more and more self-sufficient. As you break the housing and financial ties with your family, you will start to feel yourself coming into your own. Getting your own place is a HUGE step in this direction. And once you feel you can, refusing any help that you can reasonably refuse (that is, refusing any help that isn't bail, or somehow going to keep you from starving or bleeding to death, or end up sleeping on the streets) you will start to be able to refuse other things as well. Your family may never see it that way, but you won't feel as beholden to them, once you're no longer relying on their generosity. It's one of the most difficult parts of growing up, but it's also one of the most gratifying.

Your family may never see it that way, but you won't feel as beholden to them, once you're no longer relying on their generosity. It's one of the most difficult parts of growing up, but it's also one of the most gratifying.

I understand this, and I am looking forward to it myself.

I disagree. They put you in an impossible position.

Everybody talks around me so much that I have no fucking clue what to do. They make comments to my parents, and my parents filter out anything good and berate me for whatever I supposedly did wrong, and I try to make amends but supposedly, according to my relatives, I didn't do anything wrong in the first place, and then the whole vicious circle starts once again.

Several months ago, my mom asked me if I'd thanked my aunt for getting me the job, and it had never occurred to me that my aunt had told her brother (the co-worker uncle) about my situation, which is why I had gotten the job. So at the end of a phone call one day, I added, "And I don't think I thanked you for getting me the job, so thank you, etc., etc."

That night, I got an angry phone call from my parents because I had upset my aunt, who had heard, "I don't know why I should thank you for getting me the job." And she had fucking misheard, and it wasn't my goddamn fault (except it was because I talk too fucking fast), but no, I couldn't just tell her that, I was supposed to goddamn apologize and get her flowers and rub her feet and buy her a train and give her an all-expenses-paid vacation to Samoa.

And AFTER ALL THIS SHIT, my aunt tells me that she didn't even want a thank-you, she didn't care about things like that, and it hurt her more that I had bothered to say anything at all because it felt like I was being told to say it, WHICH I WAS.

I still haven't bought her flowers or anything because I think flowers are stupid and she pisses me off a lot.