So if a lesbian asks out another woman, they should find a third party to pay for the date?

Later it's made clear that if both parties are of the same sex, the asker really does pay. So it's good to know the Rules on that.

Ha! Fred and Tom both beat me to the bit that made me go "--buh?" Is this really how they do it in New York? 'Cause it doesn't happen that way in SF, at least not in my experience -- the one asking for the other's company in a specific activity is the one who's prepared to pay for the whole thing. If it's something expensive, the askee makes at least a token effort to split the cost, which the asker may or may not take the askee up on depending on their relative finances.

But that's all stuff that gets sorted out later -- at the asking stage, you either ask about something you conceivably could pay for all by yourself, or you don't ask, and when the event actually happens it's incredibly rude to expect the other person to foot the bill for something that was your idea in the first place purely on the basis of who's got the dangly bits.

This bit also bugs:

How do you respond if you’re straight and a gay person asks you out?

Laugh and say, “I don’t think my girlfriend/boyfriend would approve.” It won’t become awkward unless you become patronizing. (“Oh, that’s so sweet! I would love to go out with you. It’s so unfortunate that I’m straight. I wish I were gay! I mean, not like that, but . . . ”) If you’re not sure if you’re being asked out, just drop an unmistakable hint into the conversation referring to your heterosexuality.

Um, you can't just say "Sorry, I'm straight, but thanks"? What the hell decade was this thing regurgitated from?

Last time I looked it was 21-21 in the fifth set and they've been playing for over 5 hours!

It just finished. Longest match played at Wimbledon evah.

On edit: Knowles & Nestor def Aspelin & Perry 5-7 6-3 6-7(5) 6-3 23-21.

I would probably also say "Wow, thanks for the compliment." because I don't get asked out.

So if a lesbian asks out another woman, they should find a third party to pay for the date?

Greatest rule EVAH! Just present the data (and the check) to the nearest man.

I think it's the longest match in Grand Slam history.

6 hours and 9 minutes.

And the lucky winners of the match get to play in the semis tomorrow!

It is raining now. I wish to nap.

Oh hell no. The asker pays, period. (The askee, if s/he can afford it, should be polite and offer to split the bill, or at least cover the tip, but women asking guys out and expecting to be treated to dinner? WTF is that?)

Golddigging, IMHO. I think it's nice of a guy who's asked out to offer to pay, or at least to pay his half, but it should be in no way required that he do so.

So if a lesbian asks out another woman, they should find a third party to pay for the date?

The drawback to this strategy is that the man who ends up paying will probably want to watch.

A world of ew!

I am always more comfortable splitting a check, no matter who asked who. But two men I've dated, one of whom I married, were adamant about paying, saying it didn't feel like a date unless they did. In both cases this was sweetly old-fashioned and not aggressive or obnoxious, otherwise there would have been no more dates, and certainly no marriage.

I think one place it gets confusing - or used to to me; I haven't dated in 10 years - it sometimes it's not clear what is "a date" and what is "friends going out" and it's also not always clear just who asked whom.