Maybe I've always been here.

Early ,'Objects In Space'


Spike's Bitches 30: Going on Thirteen  

[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.


beth b - Jun 12, 2006 12:25:50 pm PDT #9236 of 10002
oh joy! Oh Rapture ! I have a brain!

working late is a hard thing to judge. It really does tend to cause rage. In general, when Matt works late, it doesn't bother me. It is part of the nature of his job. But, I distrust it when it happens continuously. Not that he is doing anything, but that someone is over useing the word CRISIS or IMPORTANT or URGENT. I don't care if someone calls at 3am if he is on call, but if someone calls at 7pm when he isn't on call I snarl ( there are a few exceptions, but that's because that actually seem to really know what an emergency is. and hint, none of these people have the title boss) However, DH is not allowed to snarl. Because he left the work phone on . and answered the work phone. He is not allowed to bitch when he could have controled the situation. Now, DH did have a job where I did bitch about him working late, because he was never home. and it wasn't unusual for him to come home at midnight.

I think if he really liked working those hours, I'd deal. But he doesn't. and he makes it very clear that he doesn't .


Burrell - Jun 12, 2006 12:29:36 pm PDT #9237 of 10002
Why did Darth Vader cross the road? To get to the Dark Side!

Well as long as we are putting our noses in where they don't belong, I'll put mine in too.

Gud, since you said,

It really is one sided, and I tend to post about stuff when I just need to get something off my chest so it sounds worse than it really is. Maybe I'm just overreacting right now too

I'm going to assume that you are right, that what we are hearing *is* one sided and that there is a history behind her words and your reactions.

My advice? If what you want is to resolve the problems and repair the marriage, then she is the one to talk to. I'd even suggest not bringing up your anger here on the board, where we will automatically take your side regardless.


beth b - Jun 12, 2006 12:32:36 pm PDT #9238 of 10002
oh joy! Oh Rapture ! I have a brain!

that I think fuel a lot of lashing out when she's stressed

we made this a semi -formal rule - that's not allowed in our house.

bad day means - matt plays guitar, or goes to pound on wood.

we both like to cook when stressed.

I do something domestic to create some order in my life, read or watch stupid tv.

and we are supposed to use words - I'm cranky, work was too crazy today, etc. so no one is walking into a landmine.

Why are people ringing my doorbell today?


Aims - Jun 12, 2006 12:33:52 pm PDT #9239 of 10002
Shit's all sorts of different now.

Why are people ringing my doorbell today?

I love this. I'ma go home and use it when I'm cranky.

"How was your day, Aimee?"

"Why are people ringing my doorbell today?"

cricket cricket

"What's for dinner?"


Burrell - Jun 12, 2006 12:37:18 pm PDT #9240 of 10002
Why did Darth Vader cross the road? To get to the Dark Side!

we made this a semi -formal rule - that's not allowed in our house.

That's a good rule, beth.


beth b - Jun 12, 2006 12:43:37 pm PDT #9241 of 10002
oh joy! Oh Rapture ! I have a brain!

Why are people ringing my doorbell today

that was suppose to be a seperate nonsequiter, but it works fo rme.

I often wonder what rules people have created for thier marriage. ours seem to be , please and thank you count and never use the D word as a joke, it should not be easy to say.


DavidS - Jun 12, 2006 12:44:16 pm PDT #9242 of 10002
"Look, son, if it's good enough for Shirley Bassey, it's good enough for you."

By "extra" do you mean that they get two weeks off in February, or just a week off?

Two weeks in December - One week in February - One week in April.

Gud, lashing out isn't okay behavior in my book. It really isn't. I mean, people lose their shit and get upset, but she's so punishing and mean about it. And it's over little things and it's unkind. Really, really unkind. She doesn't treat you with respect.

It's one thing to say things when you're upset, but it has to happen in the context of a trusting relationship. She's not somebody you would trust to have your back, or could go to and be vulnerable with.


Nora Deirdre - Jun 12, 2006 12:47:56 pm PDT #9243 of 10002
I’m responsible for my own happiness? I can’t even be responsible for my own breakfast! (Bojack Horseman)

I have accepted the offer for the new job! Tomorrow I have to talk to my current boss. That won't be fun.

(no, I did not tell her about this other prospect)


Cass - Jun 12, 2006 12:48:37 pm PDT #9244 of 10002
Bob's learned to live with tragedy, but he knows that this tragedy is one that won't ever leave him or get better.

Why are people ringing my doorbell today?
This? Just became my newest euphamism. Gotta appreciate a good bell ringing.


Aims - Jun 12, 2006 12:49:23 pm PDT #9245 of 10002
Shit's all sorts of different now.

Oooh! Oooh!

"God *DAMN* I need my doorbell rung."

That could be another one.