What makes something more than misdemeanor battery? Or is that just an arbitrary distinction?

It's a severity issue. Slapping someone is less serious than hitting them with a baseball bat, for example.

What comes after (is more severe) than misdemeanor battery?

felony battery, punishable by a year or more in jail. (the general distinction between misdemeanor and felony)

strangers waiting underneath my car to lick my toes = SO MUCH EW!

sara, as I do not have a car, I think I am ok to wear open toed shoes. Also? any stranger who licks or attempts to lick any part of me? KICK TO THE FACE OR NUTS - whichever is closer to my foot.

I hate to break it to you, msbelle, but there are foot-lickers in NYC, too: [link]

as I do not have a car

It totally doesn't have to be your car. And I know for a fact there are cars in NYC. And that your ride in some of them.

eta: And Jesse brings even more evidence!

doing the heeby jeeby dance.

Anyone who dives at my feet on the subway is most certainly getting a foot in the face, most likely a stomp. fair warning.

Yeah, I have to say, it's pretty unlikely that I would let anyone's face get that close to my feet. And I sometimes kick out, involuntarily.

Also, I kind of love that I just searched Google News for lick and subway and got right to that guy.

Jesse, I totally was going to point out that story but didn't know how to find the source. (I had only heard about it from my officemate.) Go you with your google-fu! But said officemate also told me about a guy who was arrested in Brooklyn for grabbing women's legs on the street in order to fondle them.

I didn't follow the original link, and assumed we'd been talking about the subway licker all along!

I am now having a flashback to the guy who came up to me in a bar, rushed my legs, and tried to pick me up. WTFF? Needless to say, we both fell over. I still have no idea what the fuck that was about.

I heard about these [link] this morning, but seeing them is even better!