Beej honey, really.

Wait 'til the fever has been gone for 24 or 48 hours. I just KNOW everyone is horrible and mean when I have a fever or some sort of infection, and then I feel better, and they're not so bad.

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eta...

Yay, KB!

Beej, frankly, I think those kind of concerns are best expressed face to face, and when clear-headed. There's just no good way to respond to a letter listing all the ways one disappoints the person one cares about.

Beej, I think your fever may be talking louder than your brain right now. You liked the boy pretty well last time you posted. So my advice is always: write whatever you want and have fun expressing all the bile. Then file it away and review much later, after you feel better.

I agree that you should wait to bring this up when you are not sick. But if, after the fever passes, discover that there are still issues, then I think it is wise to sit down and have a discussion about it. Money stuff never goes away.

What everyone else said. Don't send the letter while feverish. Get some rest and then see how you are feeling about things.

I can't argue the 'wait' advice. It is wise. I know that.

I really do feel like crap still. And there are lots of good things to commend him. But this money thing has been hanging over our heads for weeks now. We've been 'going to' have a talk about it...which he says will go much more easily than I imagine...and yet it hasn't HAPPENED.

And I'm feeling this manic need to clean up everything in my life. But I guess it can wait. Though the internal pressure is huge.

Second, third, fourth or fifthing everyone else. Fevers are nasty, bossy, hallucicogenic things, and you don't really want to ever do or say anything important until they're well past. Plus, in-person is best. The two of you have already done so much successful talking through of so many issues; I have total faith in your non-fevered self's ability to sit down with Fella and talk it out.

Beej, try to let of the internal pressure to clean up everything someway else if you can. Make lists of things you need to do, clean out a purse or a junk drawer that needs organizing, something that will make you feel better.

sj is wise, and probably most productive as well.

You're the best. And right. And wise. And all good things.

I think what I really need to do is go back to bed and cry for a while...then clean out a closet and make those lists. That will make me feel more powerful than my totally smited by life-feeling self right now.

Oops. I didn't make it back to bed before the tears. poop.

Thanks guys. I'll come back when my head is less...itself right now.