With iPods!

Nobody stab Robin! That is not what I meant! Clearly!

Robin, I can't write a summary of myself to save my life. I am clearly lacking in the persuasive essay department. Plus, I want the summary to say things like this: My outgoing personality, my office experience, and my recently completed education makes me good at plagiarism. I can bring this experience to your office, too! Who needs a copy machine? Not you! You have me! Plus, I answer the phones quite chipperly. AND, I’m very good at ordering pink office supplies. I have vast experience in all of the above. I’m a winner, and you should pick me. My outgoing personality and creative writing experience make me an ideal candidate for making stuff up, if you so require. I’m very team-oriented, and I’m willing to share my skill with your company. Also, my English degree and slight OCD has made me very familiar with the alphabet and organizing. NEAT AND CLEAN. It makes an office run better. I promise.

But that would be for another job, clearly. Write now I have this: Writer with good grammar, extensive experience meeting deadlines, proofreading, and editing, who is very comfortable working with computers. Organized, responsible, enthusiastic team player.

Which, really, just sounds lame. And is funny because the grammar in it is questionable.

"Write now" you have that, eh?

HA. And yes. I am leaving it like that.

P.S. My head hurts.

but it would take one look at my floorful of cables,

CarelessnessDiligent testing has taught me that the Roomba makes its way over or around piles of cords without difficulty. Also dogs.

That's the sort of thing I do all the time, Aibelle. Sorry 'bout the headache.

And I so get trying to come up with a self summary. At the moment I'm toying with joining match.com, and there's a whole personal profile thing involved. That and a picture. I have no idea what to put up for either.

Not lame, Alibelle. Dull and businesslike, which is what you want in a resume (although I do like the first one better!). Put it in resume form (for our purposes, formatting can be simple--a bold heading like EDUCATION, followed by that info. Tell us about your education, dates you graduated, any honors, and cool committees. EMPLOYMENT EXPERIENCE Any jobs you have had (even internships) and how they might contribute to your skills (such as composed email, organized filing, blah blah blah) plus at the bottom you can put ADDITIONAL INFORMATION interests--like dancing or reading specific types of books, or travel. Oh, and software you know and typing speed.

Oh! And thanks for the concern about my contact lenses. I eventually got them out, but they were in my eyeballs for 21 and a half hours, when they were supposed to be in for four. I ended up falling asleep with my fingers in my eyes, and being all oops, I can still see! when I woke up. But then I met this really nice pharmacist lady, who gave me a trick to get them out, and it worked! I am thinking of buying her a valentine's card because I now love her.

How to control your Roomba via Bluetooth.

Directed cat harrassment.

Glad they finally came out, Alibelle. I will say, when I was wearing contacts, they were the regular take-them-out-at-night kind, and I semi-regularly slept in them and wore them for two days at a time, and my eyeballs did not, in fact, fall out.

I don't want to go to school today. Bah!