Anya ,'Potential'
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
But in the scenario about which I'm curious, it's not that things aren't working. It's that things are working better with someone else.Thank you for going out with me. Although you are very qualified for the position(s), I've decided to go with someone else. I'll keep your resume on file.
If they are a tool, they will demand to know what is going on, become a stalker, or just keep trying to contact you.
I guess I qualify for tooldom then, because if I like someone and am not given a specific reason to go away (mind you, "I'm not interested in going out anymore" is a perfectly acceptable reason), I'll keep asking him out.
But that means it's NOT really working--if it was really working, you wouldn't be more interested in the other person.
Some might disagree.
(I have no personal experience with this one way or the other.)
But in the scenario about which I'm curious, it's not that things aren't working. It's that things are working better with someone else.
Oh, sorry, I misunderstood.
Like you, I don't know anything about that.
Also, from reading your posts, it's getting clear to me how "framed" dating (and especially blind-dating) in my social circle is. It's considered extremely rude to not call and clear up "where we're standing", either way, after even the one (blind) date.
Maybe, if it looks like a love thing, "I've met someone else," would be appropriate, as long as you are not insensitive enough to rhapsodize about their virtues.(Which someone did to me once...that stung a bit, even though I wasn't all invested.)
Thank you for going out with me. Although you are very qualified for the position(s), I've decided to go with someone else. I'll keep your resume on file.
Totally this! "We received many more worthy applications than we were able to fund. This should not reflect badly on the quality of your proposal."
It's considered extremely rude to not call and clear up "where we're standing", either way, after even the one (blind) date.
I've got to say, I would prefer that. Just never hearing gets old.
Well, you'd be interested in other people--hell, I'm VERY interested in Clive Owen, but not gonna date him. However, I think if you want to stop seeing this person in favor of the other person, it clearly isn't working.
I googled the Steve Martin quote and found this:
I broke up with my girlfriend. I don't know exactly when though. Maybe you recall Steve Martin's swingin' Czech character, when he discusses the break-up ritual in his country... "you say 'I break with thee, I break with thee, I break with thee,' and then you throw dog poop on her shoes." That's proactive. With my girlfriend, it seems we've broken up by default.
We haven't seen each other in over a month, neither of us has tried to contact the other by phone or e-mail for about three and change weeks now, and honestly I'm not bothered by it.
Well, that's sort of untrue. I am bothered by it in the sense that it hasn't been finalized, but by now calling her seems like a formality. "Hello, this is your courtesy break-up call." So, though I haven't officially been released from my going-steady contract, it does seem to be null and void. That's why I have secured the services of Frannie Rabinowitz, one of the top boyfriend agents in the country.
I guess I qualify for tooldom then, because if I like someone and am not given a specific reason to go away (mind you, "I'm not interested in going out anymore" is a perfectly acceptable reason), I'll keep asking him out.
How many times do you ask them out after they say no to the specific date?