Spike's Bitches 27: I'm Embarrassed for Our Kind.
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risque (and frisque), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
The rest were too busy getting drunk or writing out detention slips or planning on their retirement to teach.
I think this is what is getting me, Susan. Sure he's talking about his experience, but he's painting a pretty broad brush stroke that is easily read as applying to more than just his experience.
And I totally get that you are saying that he's talking about his experience. I'd be more willing to let it go or ignore if this were the first time he's said something incendiary and insensitive, but it isn't. Cause if whether he's talking about Seattle or telling "fuckhead" board members to "burn in motherfucking hell" or if he's talking about how much public school sucks, I've never seen him really just say,"Oops. I offended. Sorry." In fact, even acknowledging that one has "over-over-over-over-over-reacted " is not quite the same as saying "whoa. Sorry. I'll try not to do that again."
So maybe, in light of that, I'm not really willing to let it go or ignore it.
I mean, frankly my particular public school system was terrible for me too, despite quite a few fine and dedicated teachers. But the system wasn't really designed for kids like me, and while I did learn some great things in school, on the balance I got into a top college and did well there despite my K-12 education rather than because of it. I floundered in calculus and even had to work a bit at my non-major's science requirements because my pre-collegiate foundation was so lousy. I would've been completely out of my depth in a real collegiate biology, physics, or chemistry class, and I struggled in economics, because I was so weak WRT math.
But I don't know if I can say that the public schools in my corner of Alabama in the 70's and 80's did a lousy job of preparing me for college and for a future anywhere outside that podunk town without being accused of teacher-bashing.
OK.
To be blunt, I feel like Dylan isn't welcome here.
And if he isn't, then I'm not either, really.
I mean, if Dylan is some kind of horrible person, what does it say about me that I chose to marry him?
Obviously I can't speak for anyone else, but neither of you are unwelcome to me. Which reminds me, Seattle is not representing in my call for F2F pimpage! Which then also reminds me, happy birthday Jilli!
what does it say about me that I chose to marry him?
That you love him and that he loves you and that together you just click and work well together.
It doesn't, for me, have much to do with how people fit in an online community.
Susan, I'm not saying anything about the state of his character or yours. I'm saying he's ruffled my feathers and I am asking for something because of that. I am also saying that it's not the first time he's ruffled feathers and not really addressed it.
I want to be as clear as I can. For me, I've seen a breach (and more than one) in community behavior. And I've seen it happen in more than one thread with more than one person. Right now, I'm offended and I'm trying to resolve it in thread.
I am addressing a conflict that has offended me in the way that the board has decided conflicts should be addressed. I am not sure how you've gone from that to saying he is unwelcome. If being asked to obey community standards is unwelcoming, then I don't know what to do.
I would've been completely out of my depth in a real collegiate biology, physics, or chemistry class, and I struggled in economics, because I was so weak WRT math.
But that's not necessarily the school's fault, is it? I mean, not everyone is going to excel at everything. You could have had the guy from Numb3rs teaching me math and I would have flunked. Education is always a two-way street -- teacher *and* student.
Also, I don't think anyone said Dylan is a horrible person. And you married him because you love him. That's what important, not what someone else thinks of him, yes?
I am not sure how you've gone from that to saying he is unwelcome. If being asked to obey community standards is unwelcoming, then I don't know what to do.
While I'm undoubtedly biased, it feels to me like Dylan is getting criticism for things that I could say, if not with impugnity, at least with considerable benefit of the doubt.
But that's not necessarily the school's fault, is it? I mean, not everyone is going to excel at everything.
Not necessarily, and I don't think math is my greatest natural strength. But my school was demonstrably weak in math. I was the ONLY person I knew in college who hadn't taken calculus in high school--because my school didn't offer it. Our math teacher (I had the same one for four years, since he taught everything algebra and higher) was good, but a proper college preparatory education should've included calculus. And as for the sciences, trust me, my school was weak.
In general, compared to almost all of my college friends, I came from a high school that just wasn't that focused on advanced academics and preparing students to get into and succeed at a top college. Which isn't necessarily a failing on my school's part--most kids there didn't WANT that. But I did. Which is why it was a bad school for me.
