At certain times of day (i.e., when you need to) just bundle Em up and announce "I'm taking Emeline out for a little while; we'll be back at 4," (or, alternatively, "can you watch her for an hour or so") or somesuch. Just make sure to carve out a few hours away here and there where you need to. For me, the easiest way to do that has been to not make any big statement or announcement, and not so much ask permission. Just let people know what you're doing - stay a bit flexible in case you pick a bad moment, but don't try to make it a big discussion of can/can't, should/shouldn't.
And huge hugs to you. I'm really glad for you that you'll get this time with him, but I'm so sorry it has to be this way.
Brenda is brilliant.
If somebody argues, say "She needs to stretch her legs", which is true.
I don't wanna go.
God damn, why did this just hit now.
I don't wanna go.
...
hell, I got nothin'. Except love and hugs and the promise that one day the pain will be blunted. It's not ever going to go away, but you will get to the point where you can function without wanting to cry and you think of your grandpa with an easy smile.
Aims, the situation sucks all around, but go. I've managed to avoid a few such trips, and while it was what I desperately wanted to do at the time, I really regretted it -- and I've also gone on some, and ended up remembering it as very precious time spent.
All my love is with your whole family.
Thanks guys.
I know in the long run I'll be happy I went. But right now, well, my grandparents dying was NEVER AN OPTION. And now, it is. And it pisses me off.
I'm a total cow. I've been luckier than most to have had my grampa for 31 years. But dammit, I'm NOT READY.
Aw, hon. I have no grands left, and it's still NOT AN OPTION. I so completely get you.
I don't think you're ever ready, when it's someone you love.
And echoing Betsy's assessment of brenda's brilliance. This especially:
Just let people know what you're doing - stay a bit flexible in case you pick a bad moment, but don't try to make it a big discussion of can/can't, should/shouldn't.
{{{Aimee}}}
