Two exceptions exist: (1) if I actually ask "Hey, do I look like a manatee today?"
Honestly, maybe not even then. "Yo, do I look fat?" "YES YOU DO." That's not right.
True -- but in accordance with exception #1, if *I* am the one who initiates the question, the other person is allowed to speak of my weight. Though that's a good point -- #1a will be that they're only allowed to say things like "Well, now that you mention it, you do look a little puffy...."
But not like Puffy, because, frankly, that would just be weird.
Fiona, the bath picture is making me very, very dead.
But not like Puffy, because, frankly, that would just be weird.
You mean Diddy, right?
Mr. Combs, you betcha.
But not like Puffy, because, frankly, that would just be weird.
At first glance I read it as "buffy" and it was really strange.
Honestly, maybe not even then. "Yo, do I look fat?" "YES YOU DO." That's not right.
I understand there are scenarios in which that question is code for "Make me feel better, okay?"
However, you have to know each time you ask it to a new person, they may be naïve or literal enough to think you are to be taken at your word.
I would recommend not asking me that question if you don't want to know. I'm not that sort of a comfort-giver.
But your sister-in-law appears to be tiny enough to make my size 12 self look like a Teamster. I could only be her size if I cut off my legs, and I don't worry about my weight.
Whatever they're on, I want two doses.
I understand there are scenarios in which that question is code for "Make me feel better, okay?"
There are so many factors involved. My level of knowing the person who asks - do I know them well enough to evaluate whether they want "to feel better" or an honest opinion? What is the situation - right before entering a room full of people, or at home in a heartfelt conversation or anything in between? The history of the person, the level of closeness I feel to them, and so forth.
So for me, it's one of those "different people, different things" situations. If it's a really good friend, most likely I'll give a completely honest opinion, though.
I would recommend not asking me that question if you don't want to know. I'm not that sort of a comfort-giver.
In general, I guess I'd recommend never asking the question anyway, because who ever wants to know if the answer is yes, and they can't tell themselves.
I'm not devaluing the question as seeking comfort, except when directed at me. I'd like to think that people know me well enough to know that if you want politeness you can get it, but if you don't want the truth -- it was kinda rude to set me up.
