Lola Falana!

Sorry, I seem to be in a mid-1970s-starlet fugue here.

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Wait, we want to find them, right?

The rich ones, you betcha.

She's a cautionary tale.

If I can't be a good example, I'll just have to be a cautionary tale.

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Plei, here's the dress

Cute!

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Bush refuses to rule out force against Iran

[link]

Sounds like the Iran rhetoric is heating up.

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My gut feeling is that I dislike severing physical attraction from the romantic love equation. I think it's Paul-ist or something - distrusting the body.

But what I'm trying to do is sever romantic love from the physical attraction equation. It's a whole different vibe.

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My gut feeling is that I dislike severing physical attraction from the romantic love equation.

That's funny, only because I think of you as much sexually freer (in attitude) than I am or than I would want to be. I think sex works better in concert with love.

I think it's Paul-ist or something - distrusting the body.

How is that Paulist? I'm not getting the reference.

I think it is as valid a definition of love as any other we have.

Really?

I don't much like the exalted love ideal as promulgated by Medieval troubadours which has dribbled on down to our century. I think a lot of western culture's notions about love are kind of pathological. Particularly in USian culture.

Me too, but I'm confused a little by what you're saying, because it seems to me you're saying the opposite above, when you're saying it's as valid a definition of love as any other we have. I think a lot of people mistake sexual attraction and desire for love, even when love doesn't come. To me, the ideal love for a couple (I want to use the word 'romantic' to modify it, but I don't want the baggage, but you know what I mean, yes?) has the sexual component, but also includes the kinds of devotion one has toward a close friend, family members. I don't know that I wouldn't say the types aren't dependent on each other. I don't think there can be a neat separation, because they enhance each other, and when one component is missing, the other levels on which partners relate seems (to me) to suffer.

There's also some suspcion that the ideas of romantic love that don't factor in sexual attraction are either acts of bad faith or rationalizations.

What did you mean, above? I'm not following. I don't think I understand what a romantic love could be if/when sexual attraction isn't factored in.

In sum: I suspect that romantic love may be a subset of sex with a lot of higher cortical function dancing around madly trying to distract us from this unflattering truth.

I don't know. I think it can be, but I don't think I would call that love. I would still call it desire. I love Scott in all the ways you love someone, and my desire for him is strong. If an illness was going to remove one aspect from our relationship though, it would be easier, although very sad and a trial, to lose the sexual aspect than it would be to lose his...I don't know what to call it...his companionship. He's my best friend and most trusted ally. He's my confidant. If our relationship were to end, it would be hard work surviving it, because he would be the one I'd want to run to--to pour my heart out about it.

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Because even in my unloving state there are guys whose groins I might want to be around, but don't particularly care for their insides, even as initially presented. The guys who you know might get into your pants, but are not getting your number.

exactly.

It isn't that desire /lust is seperate from love, but they are different. And I also believe that desire/lust can last. Unfortunatley it is an emotion that can be influenced by someone forgetting to take out the garbage ( let alone more serious issues) .

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Orientation: Mostly boys, though not as exclusively as I believed before I met you all. Attraction: that thing that made me watch Many Splendored Thing seventy-five times because the last scene is hot. If Timmy were real, I'm not sure if I'd love him yet, although his obsessions pull on my "woobie" heartstrings.(I'd love to get the chance to test that theory though.) I love my friends but I'd only get naked with a very few.(I'm not telling!)

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I just don't understand how they can expect to win against the show

I think the argument is that they were promised a place to live. They didn't get a place to live, the other family did.

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I love Scott in all the ways you love someone, and my desire for him is strong. If an illness was going to remove one aspect from our relationship though, it would be easier, although very sad and a trial, to lose the sexual aspect than it would be to lose his...I don't know what to call it...his companionship

and Cindy says the other part of what I was trying to say but kept tripping ove rwhat I was saying . ( however where you see the word 'Scott' replace with 'Matt')

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